IHi all, 

 

Thank you so much Luke for creating this, its wonderful being here, 

 

This is Pearl's mother as you know me from SA.

 

Starting my introduction thread briefly here:

 

Our pharma journey was started in 2021 and we wrongly tapered to zero in February 2023.

 

Since then Pearl has been in withdrawal, especially first 2 years were hell, full of complete mental confusion, brain fog and boiling violent rage.

 

The rage lifted in February 2025. 

 

Currently the main symptom remaining is brain fog. The overall improvement has been good and entire journey is recorded in SA in detail here; https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/forums/topic/29576-pearlsmom1979-boiling-rageanger-and-cognitive-decline/

 

Thank you so much Luke for creating this, it's wonderful ? 

 

Would love to see this forum growing and doing good work like SA has been doing

 

Love and blessings ? ?

Welcome to the forum, Pearlsmom1979.

 

I am the Recovery Assistant Bot and I am here to post some information for you whilst we await replies from other members.

 

This is a volunteer-run, community forum aimed at helping those who are experiencing difficulties with psychiatric medications. If you are experiencing an adverse reaction to them, withdrawal difficulties or are injured by them, we are very sorry to hear this and will do what we can to help you.

 

While we are waiting for human members to reply, there are some things you can do that will help you get the most out of this forum whilst you await further support.

 

Please familiarise yourself with the forum rules and the disclaimer located here:

https://antidepressantrecovery.org/misc.php?action=help

 

Please update your signature. This will allow members to see some basic information about your drug history and situation so that they may help you best. Information on how to do this is located in the guides linked above, but here is a direct link:

https://antidepressantrecovery.org/misc.php?action=help&hid=8

 

Once this is done, future posts made by you will have this signature turned on by default.

 

If you have migrated here from "SurvivingAntidepressants" feel free to post a link to your old thread in this one, or include it in your signature.

 

We hope that you will find this forum helpful.

Hi Pearlsmom1979

 

Welcome to the forum.

Hi Pearlsmom.  I'm pleased to see you here.

xo

R.

I’ve linked your SA blog in your intro above for you. 

 

Chippy

Thank you so much @chippy I was unable to do it myself.

 

It's lovely to see you here @rachelsusan

Thank you so much @chippy I was unable to do it myself.

 

It's lovely to see you here @rachelsusan

:heart:

Thank you for joining. I haven't commented much, but I had been reading your updates periodically.

 

It seems to me that the trend towards improvement is clear and that Pearl is improving in time. I hope that continues.

Thank you Luke for creating this space and for your kind comment, it's a huge responsibility and I am so thankful to you, our best wishes for your healing and for this portal as well.

 

 

Yes Pearl is improving by God's Grace,  hopefully very soon she will be completely back to herself .

 

Love and blessings ? ?

Hopefully in time you'll write her success story here.

 

Thank you Luke for creating this space and for your kind comment, it's a huge responsibility and I am so thankful to you, our best wishes for your healing and for this portal as well.

 

You're welcome. Special mention goes to Chippy for his help.

Yes Luke so true, we all will write our success stories one day and ofcourse thanks to Chippy for helping me switch to here so smoothly:)

Wishing all my friends here a very happy, healing, soothing and positive new year ? 

 

 

We all will heal in time and 2026 will be our year...

 

Love and blessings for all of us here ?

Thank you! You too!

Thanks a lot Luke and Chippy, especially for the app, it's so easy to use ..

 

Love and blessings 

6 hours ago, Pearlsmom1979 said:

Thanks a lot Luke and Chippy, especially for the app, it's so easy to use ..

 

Love and blessings 

 

You're very welcome.

 

Please do let us know how Pearl is doing, when you feel it is appropriate and you want to.

Thank you @Luke 

 

Yes I will post regular updates here.

 

Pearl is doing very well and as I have been updating in SA, there are no major changes happening now but week after week we are seeing small but gradual improvements.

 

Communication and behaviour is getting better and better week by week. Her logical thinking was completely gone but it is starting to come back now , and thank God for that as it is highly important for her studies.

 

We are working on her missed education at home these days and taking children on lots of holidays to cover up missed time in their childhood , thanks to wrongful prescriptions by doctors.

 

Hope you are also recovering well, I have read your thread and I cannot even imagine the withdrawal you have been through.

 

Sending love and blessings for all of us here !!!

That's great to hear.

 

I look forward to hearing further updates that hopefully say she's improving even more.

Update for records:

 

On 14th February, we completed 3 years of being zero.

 

No sign of rage since February 2025 (one year of no rage)

 

Good communication and understanding. Bits of memories are missing, especially from school and brain fog is still there to some extent.

 

But little by little her original self keeps on coming back.

 

Our tapering was really completely wrong as we had skipped doses regularly throughout our one year of use of drugs, but still healing is happening.

 

Time is the only answer. 

 

The biggest challenge for us now is making up for her lost education as she has been a brilliant student but hopefully we will be able to sort this with time and patience. 

 

Love and blessings for all of us here 💗 

Thank you for the update, hopefully she keeps getting better and all of this will eventually just be a distant memory when she grows up and up.

Yes as @Luke said, thanks for the update, we all have it crossed that Pearl can continue to improve and put all this behind her, she has her whole life ahead for her to enjoy. 🙂  Chippy

Thank you so much @Luke and @Chippy

 

We all will heal and recover in time

 

Love and blessings ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ 

Update for self records:

 

37 months of being drug free:

 

After 13 months of normalcy, we have hit a wave and today is day 3 of that.

She is sleeping day and night, does not want to be disturbed, does not want to eat and screams if we disturb her.

 

Ofcourse we continue to try to take her out (today could go for a 2 hours  outing successfully) but otherwise all she wants is to sleep or lies down with eyes closed.

 

If we switch on her TV sometimes she watches if she wants but otherwise mostly sleeping.

 

From past experience, we are letting her be, except when most essential basic needs are concerned, like using restroom atleast twice a day is required or brushing her teeth, we are not pushing her.

 

The intensity of anger seems to be mild as compared to the past but still cannot be very sure.

 

It's not over even at 3 plus years of being zero drug. God save us!!

 

Hoping it will pass soon.

 

Love and blessings for all of us here 💗 

 

@Pearlsmom1979 I have read your thread on SA and I cannot imagine what this hell has been like for you as a parent. I am so sorry Pearl is going through another wave, that must be frustrating and worrying for you. The best thing really is her age. The brain is still so very plastic in adolescence. 

 

I am curious - did Pearl ever get an MRI of her head in the early days or have a lumbar puncture for encephalitis, or screening for NMDA antibodies? She has clearly sustained a severe brain injury, but I am wondering if other things were ruled out as the cause in the early days? The timing of her symptom onset with initiation of the psychiatric drugs does fit with them being the culprit though.

 

As a psychiatrist, I apologise for the ignorance of my profession and the harm we have done. I cannot wait to leave the profession but ironically I am too ill from my own withdrawal to plan a career change right now (6 months off meds, still more than 20 symptoms most days). I am doing my best from the inside to try and prevent this from happening to others. Sadly, many patients still want medication to treat their disress and indeed I have had a patient make a formal complaint against me in recent months for refusing to prescribe more medication to them. We are fighting collective brain washing. It is a sad system and it is broken. 

Thank you @Sminismoni for your time.

 

I am so sorry you are going through the withdrawal and thank you for taking time to read our thread and reply for us.

 

We were never suggested to get any head MRI for Pearl.

 

But I am worried for her now why do you think we should have got it done?

 

All of us do go through these symptoms during withdrawal so why do you think Pearl might have encephalitis, or should get screening for NMDA antibodies?

 

Kindly explain and help me understand what did you find different for our case to indicate this.

 

Wishing you best of luck for your withdrawal.

 

Love and blessings for all.

 

@Pearlsmom1979  I say this with the greatest of respect, but having read the symptoms you described for Pearl in your SA thread, and even now her sudden need to sleep so much, and the first duagnosis that crossed my mind as a doctor was NMDA encephalitis.

 

It occurs in children and young adults, often women, and can present with psychotic symptoms, mutism, cognitive decline and go on relapsing and remitting for years, especially if not treated. There is treatment available that helps significantly: immunotherapy. 

 

Autoimmune encephalitis - Symptoms and causes - Mayo Clinic https://share.google/rLzHOsaEmbT6Md7cr

 

Anti-NMDAR Encephalitis | Center for Autoimmune Neurology | Perelman School of Medicine at the University of Pennsylvania https://share.google/Q2CI6LFTMwsZhMTMX

 

I urge you, and again, I mean this with all due respect, please get her tested - a blood test can check for NMDA receptor antibodies. Otherwise a lumber puncture can also be diagnostic. Given the extent of her suffering and how long it has been going on for, this is a very small thing you can do that could make a big difference. If the tests are negative, you can assume it is psychiatric medication induced and continue to care for Pearl as you have done.