5 minutes ago, cherrysquid said:

Me too ❤️

And its Bitsy the mouse from a D&D podcast haha.

Cool-just looked it up. Ive played dnd for like 15 years but had never heard of avantris. Maybe something for me to listen to! Cheers

2 minutes ago, kangamangus said:

Cool-just looked it up. Ive played dnd for like 15 years but had never heard of avantris. Maybe something for me to listen to! Cheers

Urgh im jealous. Ive always wanted to play but none of my friends are into it. I was invited to a gathering a few years ago but I only knew one person and was too shy 😂 ill have to stick to BG3 haha

9 minutes ago, cherrysquid said:

Urgh im jealous. Ive always wanted to play but none of my friends are into it. I was invited to a gathering a few years ago but I only knew one person and was too shy 😂 ill have to stick to BG3 haha

Love bg3. I hope one day you find a good group to play with. Ive been lucky in that regard, same group of friends since high school still play together.

Really suffering quite badly this morning. About 1 hour of sleep last night. In a total state of panic and flight or fight. Hot flashes and shaking. This is the worst wave ive had. I had a window from Saturday-Monday. Brief window last night of about 2 hours before the shaking started. Just have to keep telling myself that. I will feel better again, its just hard. My body is telling me to hold, so that is what I will do. I need time for this to settle, but god its so hard sometimes. Will never take sleep for granted again.

53 minutes ago, kangamangus said:

Really suffering quite badly this morning. About 1 hour of sleep last night. In a total state of panic and flight or fight. Hot flashes and shaking. This is the worst wave ive had. I had a window from Saturday-Monday. Brief window last night of about 2 hours before the shaking started. Just have to keep telling myself that. I will feel better again, its just hard. My body is telling me to hold, so that is what I will do. I need time for this to settle, but god its so hard sometimes. Will never take sleep for granted again.

I’m so sorry @kangamangus, just hang in there. Sometimes we just need to survive a minute at a time. My thoughts are with you today.

28 minutes ago, SarahMc said:

I’m so sorry @kangamangus, just hang in there. Sometimes we just need to survive a minute at a time. My thoughts are with you today.

Thanks Sarah, I appreciate that. Surviving a minute at a time is what im doing 🙏

1 hour ago, kangamangus said:

Really suffering quite badly this morning. About 1 hour of sleep last night. In a total state of panic and flight or fight. Hot flashes and shaking. This is the worst wave ive had. I had a window from Saturday-Monday. Brief window last night of about 2 hours before the shaking started. Just have to keep telling myself that. I will feel better again, its just hard. My body is telling me to hold, so that is what I will do. I need time for this to settle, but god its so hard sometimes. Will never take sleep for granted again.

Stay strong. Bad day for me too. We can do this. It'll pass x

9 minutes ago, cherrysquid said:

Stay strong. Bad day for me too. We can do this. It'll pass x

Sorry to hear that Cherry. We got this. Hang in there

Welcome to the forum.

Hopefully the window of a few days is a sign that you will stabilise in time.

Really struggling. Ive never felt so exhausted in my life, and yet I still feel that "activation". 48hours with 5 hours sleep and rolling panic attacks. Hoping for sleep tonight and a better tomorrow

I definitely empathize with that horrendous combination of exhaustion and activation. I hope you get some sleep tonight 💜.

I was able to eat a little bit tonight and have calmed down some. My average heart rate yesterday was 100, going up to 130-140 during the panic attacks. Today it was 86 and I didn't have panic attacks as bad as yesterday. Hope this means things are calming down for me. Still feel very sensitized. Thinking now that I never gave my CNS a chance to heal years ago when I initially dealt with withdrawal. Stupid of me, but the pain was too much at the time. I hope one day it can heal and I haven't done permanent damage. Its hard to keep hope that I can heal, but what choice do I have? One foot in front of the other is all I can do. Does anybody have experience with sudden jerking/electric shock sensations when falling asleep? Its like I am so tired and start to doze off then a sudden surge through my body, almost like adrenaline. Wakes me up and I start shaking. Hoping somebody else has dealt with this and has some tips for how to cope and getting sleep.

On 7/15/2026 at 4:57 AM, kangamangus said:

Hello, its been a few months since I have posted here. I found I was ruminating too much on withdrawal and had to step back a bit. My taper has been progressing okay, and I am now 25% off of the Sertraline, but unfortunately I am having a hard time now. About a month ago I unknowingly ingested a decent amount of caffeine and had a massive panic attack. This seemed to trigger a horrible wave that I have been stuck in since. I have had windows during that time, but they are fleeting. I have been holding my dose since the panic attack in the hopes that my system would settle down. Yesterday I had a great window followed by another terrible panic attack. Woke up early today and had another panic attack around noon, and I have been stuck in flight-or-fight mode since. I am immensely uncomfortable right now and at a loss for what to do. My rational mind is saying to keep holding at my current dose, but part of me is wondering if I should resume my taper since I was in tolerance withdrawal when I began. I truly don't know what to do. I need to be better about recording my daily thoughts and feelings so I can document the windows when they do happen. I just need to remember that yesterday I was feeling much better than I am right now. I can get back there again. Ugh. Just venting I guess. I will try to update my signature when I am feeling up to it, right now I can barely type this post. Not doing well at all.

On 7/15/2026 at 5:01 AM, kangamangus said:

I forgot to mention, during my first terrible panic attack after the caffeine I took half of a .5mg Klonopin that my mother gave me. It helped in the moment, but I have been wondering if it possibly upset my nervous system even more. I still have the other half of the pill if I really really feel like I need it but I have been able to do without for now. God this anxiety is just unreal.

Hi @kangamangus very sorry for the hot spot you are in.

I feel you well with the unbearable chemical anxiety and understand the dilemma about a possible reduction, I think we are all torn between reducing quickly and waiting and hoping to balance and I wish there was a paved and clear path for all of us but unfortunately there's not.

I think if you managed to balance after waiting long enough in the past it is the right thing to do but of course it is your personal decision.

Regarding Benzo, I understand the desire to lower the flame but it is impossible to put out fire with fire, there is a risk here that is not worth taking.

Please hold on, every difficulty is meant to pass and this too.

Wishing you easier days very soon.

6 hours ago, kangamangus said:

I hope one day it can heal and I haven't done permanent damage.

You won't have, the nerous system is designed to heal, just it isn't fast at it! You are doing great, as others have said the windows are great signs of the body adjusting and healing. More to come. x

Went to bed earlier last night and managed maybe 4 hours of sleep. Woke up around 4am and kind of dozed in and out until around 7. When I got up, had a bad panic attack. Feeling more settled now and my heart rate has come down. Have a bad headache now and just generally hurt all over. Feel "activated". Like my nervous system has been hooked up to a car battery. Feel like s***. Just very upset by this whole thing. Hoping for a peaceful day. I am not functioning well at all. Spent most of the past 3 days in bed.

54 minutes ago, kangamangus said:

Went to bed earlier last night and managed maybe 4 hours of sleep. Woke up around 4am and kind of dozed in and out until around 7. When I got up, had a bad panic attack. Feeling more settled now and my heart rate has come down. Have a bad headache now and just generally hurt all over. Feel "activated". Like my nervous system has been hooked up to a car battery. Feel like s***. Just very upset by this whole thing. Hoping for a peaceful day. I am not functioning well at all. Spent most of the past 3 days in bed.

Hang in there @kangamangus I know its so hard but better times are ahead. Ive seen "activated" mentioned on here a lot. What does it mean?

Are you able to distract yourself with something?

The car battery sensation is awful what helps me with that is a warm bath and I massage bio oil into my stomach and chest where I feel the buzzing sensations.

Hope you feel better soon x

Just now, cherrysquid said:

Hang in there @kangamangus I know its so hard but better times are ahead. Ive seen "activated" mentioned on here a lot. What does it mean?

Are you able to distract yourself with something?

The car battery sensation is awful what helps me with that is a warm bath and I massage bio oil into my stomach and chest where I feel the buzzing sensations.

Hope you feel better soon x

Oh also a mug of warm milk soothes the buzzing but again I get it in my stomach and chest it might be somewhere else for you

I am considering updosing. I feel so incredibly dizzy and faint. I dont know what to do. I am terrified of going to the hospital. Any advice would be welcome

1 hour ago, kangamangus said:

I am considering updosing. I feel so incredibly dizzy and faint. I dont know what to do. I am terrified of going to the hospital. Any advice would be welcome

I'm so sorry for your suffering @kangamangus. I don't know enough about updosing to comment responsibly so I'll leave that to others but I just wanted to say that we're here for you. Do you have anyone around to look after you?

25 minutes ago, SarahMc said:

I'm so sorry for your suffering @kangamangus. I don't know enough about updosing to comment responsibly so I'll leave that to others but I just wanted to say that we're here for you. Do you have anyone around to look after you?

Yes my mother is here. I just feel so strange. Never felt this bad in my life. Im very scared. Dont know how I will get through this. Thank you

3 hours ago, kangamangus said:

Yes my mother is here. I just feel so strange. Never felt this bad in my life. Im very scared. Dont know how I will get through this. Thank you

I know it is so, so hard. I think most people on here (including myself) will tell you that WD or drug injury is the worst they've ever felt. And like you, I still have a long taper ahead of me. It is scary, but we can see that so many people ahead of us have gotten through it, so we can too. Keep up the fight.

I spoke with a psychiatrist on the phone today. Couldn"t take the activated/akathisia feeling anymore. He is a deprescribing psychiatrist that helps people come off of their meds. He suggested to me that we try propranolol to help in the short term and then resume my taper at a slower pace. I have to get blood work done first which I am going to do tomorrow. Really hoping this helps me cope.

17 hours ago, kangamangus said:

Feel "activated". Like my nervous system has been hooked up to a car battery.

15 hours ago, kangamangus said:

I am considering updosing. I feel so incredibly dizzy and faint. I dont know what to do. I am terrified of going to the hospital. Any advice would be welcome

As you feel overly activated I would suggest not updosing personally, it might make you worse. If you do still want to try just around 2.5% max of you current dose so pretty much back to your previous is all I would suggest.

7 hours ago, kangamangus said:

I spoke with a psychiatrist on the phone today. Couldn"t take the activated/akathisia feeling anymore. He is a deprescribing psychiatrist that helps people come off of their meds. He suggested to me that we try propranolol to help in the short term and then resume my taper at a slower pace. I have to get blood work done first which I am going to do tomorrow. Really hoping this helps me cope.

My thoughts would be to not add any more fuel to fire, but of course this is your choice. I am sorry things are so tough for you atm.

19 hours ago, Chippy said:

My thoughts would be to not add any more fuel to fire, but of course this is your choice. I am sorry things are so tough for you atm.

Thanks Chippy. I felt it was necessary as I felt unable to cope. I am not going to updose, I was just in such a desperate state.

Better day today. Just wanted to write that down. Yesterday was the most severe I have ever been. Truly truly horrifying. Felt convinced I had severe brain damage. Still feel that way a little. Lifted just enough at night for me to get 6 hours of sleep.

Woke up today around 7am with intense heart pounding anxiety. Anxiety dissipated and I felt much better than yesterday, I think due to getting some actual restful sleep. If yesterday was an 15/10 on the awful scale today was a 6/10. Even had dreams last night which I havent for a while. Feeling better lasted most of the day, interspersed with some periods of increased anxiety and restlessness. Began to feel bad again once it began to get dark out but it has since settled down. Felt on the verge of a panic attack and told myself if you are going to have one, go ahead and get it over with. Never happened.

I did recieve the prescription for propranolol today. 10mg.I decided to take it. I took half of a pill around 5:30 and felt no discernable difference. Thought I was going to have a panic attack taking it, I was so afraid of triggering something but I didnt. I don't know if it helped or not, if it did the effect was very minor. I took the other half around 8:30. Again no change or very minor calming. Not sure if I will take anymore. Will sleep on it tonight.

Thanks for all of the kind words of encouragement everybody. Tuesday through Thursday this week were awful awful. I appreciate this Site for being somewhere I could reach out to in my desperation.