HI everyone,

 

I swore I had posted something here as it prompted me to do so but I don't see anything to indicate that it in fact got posted...unless my profile is still being reviewed since I joined recently?

Anyway...I'm a 28 year old female and have been on antidepressants since I was 15. After years of trying to find the "right" pill (one can only hope), I decided it was just enough and so started tapering. I have no idea of my baseline. I also have no idea if these pills were even helping me and then began to question whether they may be making things worse.

At one point I was at 350mg of Sertraline. I am currently at 200mg. Up to this point has been a huge roller coaster, and I have found the hardest part to be the lack of support while going through this. I don't currently have a therapist and so am open to any recommendations. 🙂

The reason I was at such a high dose of the Sert is because I was diagnosed with OCD which, according to literature (according to my psych), higher doses are required in order for the OCD to respond.

I have been unwell for the better half of my life and my support system has grown somewhat tired of that so me tapering off meds and experiencing withdrawal is not something they have much patience for at this point which I can understand. 

I honestly have been reluctant to post and I'm not exactly sure why that is. I am just scared because starting this taper has brought up so many thoughts and emotions which I know can happen and of course any mental health conditions can worsen. 

I have had really good moments or days but those have not been had recently. I can't even say they were days that I felt like myself because I don't really know who I am. Which brings into question whether the things that have been upsetting to me all these years such as the things I have gone to therapy for...were they really upsetting me or was it the meds messing with my head? Obviously not going to ask my psychiatrist about this lol. I feel so sad and behind as I have had jobs but I want to start my "career" like my corporate career and just feel discouraged based on my age and feel the need to make up for lost time. All these years I've also really never had a serious romantic relationship, which I desire. I have also lost many friendships. I have one close friend. I still live at home and its not the best environment given the lack of emotional support. I am doing some casual work and want to begin applying for full time positions. But I have no idea what I want to do. And like I said, I feel so behind so there's a lot of pressure. I did manage to complete an undergrad (before having begun the taper lol). I also understand the need to taper slowly as I went down by 25mg and then after 2 weeks went down by another 25mg as advised by my psych and I was literally bedridden. It was so horrid. My mental health was amplified to 100%. I was riddled with anxiety. Would not wish that on my worst enemy.

I usually have a lot more to say but I would rather post and interact with you guys than hold off posting just to provide more detail into my current circumstances.

It's so hard to type out all the events of my life that led me to here but I'm glad and grateful to have found this community in order to feel just a little less alone throughout this process.

Thanks everyone for reading ❤️

Hi @strengthinnumbers

 

Welcome to the forum!

 

This is a volunteer-run, community forum aimed at helping those who are tapering and/or experiencing difficulties with psychiatric medications and withdrawl syndrome. We are not medical professionals and cannot offer medical advice. We simply offer support and opinions which you could use as talking points with a medical provider knowledgeable in withdrawing off psychiatric medications.

 

Please familiarise yourself with the forum rules and the disclaimer located here: Guidelines

 

Please make sure your signature is kept up to date with your drug history. This will allow members to see some basic information about your drug history and situation so that they may help you best. Information on how to do this is located in the FAQs section above, but here is a direct link: Update Signature

Once this is done, future posts made by you will have this signature turned on by default. For this reason please keep it clear but condensed as possible.

 

2 hours ago, strengthinnumbers said:

I swore I had posted something here as it prompted me to do so but I don't see anything to indicate that it in fact got posted...unless my profile is still being reviewed since I joined recently?

Sorry for the confusion, you filled in your signature with your intro, instead of creating a new topic.

 

In your signature we just need all your drug/dose changes/history, nice and clear. Written like this:

 

01 Jan 2026 Sertraline 100mg

01 Feb 2026 Sertraline 90mg

And so on...

 

Also, let me know what you would like your thread to be called? I have left it as it is now, but it would be nice if you had something else perhaps? 🙂 

 

2 hours ago, strengthinnumbers said:

Anyway...I'm a 28 year old female and have been on antidepressants since I was 15. After years of trying to find the "right" pill (one can only hope), I decided it was just enough and so started tapering. I have no idea of my baseline. I also have no idea if these pills were even helping me and then began to question whether they may be making things worse.

Im sorry to read this. We know now that drugs are not the answer to lifes problems. Many of us wish we worked this out before going to see our doctors. They can help numb your emotions, but that effect wears off pretty quickly as tolerance builds. Then there are of course the side effects, wd effects and interactions of poly pharmacy to think about.

 

2 hours ago, strengthinnumbers said:

At one point I was at 350mg of Sertraline. I am currently at 200mg. Up to this point has been a huge roller coaster, and I have found the hardest part to be the lack of support while going through this. I don't currently have a therapist and so am open to any recommendations. 🙂

The reason I was at such a high dose of the Sert is because I was diagnosed with OCD which, according to literature (according to my psych), higher doses are required in order for the OCD to respond.

350mg of Sertraline is a lot of drug. Above 80-100mg actually doesn't have that much affect on the brain. It is just excess drug. All that extra can of course cause other problems. This isn't a perfect science though, and many do have issues tapering down at much higher doses then we would expect.

 

Unfortunately this idea of more is needed isnt based in any science, just trial and error on the part of doctors. Try one drug, if it doesn't 'work' increase the dose, if that doesn't 'work' switch drugs. Its a recipe for disaster often.

 

2 hours ago, strengthinnumbers said:

I have been unwell for the better half of my life and my support system has grown somewhat tired of that so me tapering off meds and experiencing withdrawal is not something they have much patience for at this point which I can understand. 

I honestly have been reluctant to post and I'm not exactly sure why that is. I am just scared because starting this taper has brought up so many thoughts and emotions which I know can happen and of course any mental health conditions can worsen. 

Im sorry, it can be very tough I know. Others who have not been through this find it very hard to understand.

 

I am glad you have found us though, and you will find lots of support in here 🙂 

 

2 hours ago, strengthinnumbers said:

I have had really good moments or days but those have not been had recently. I can't even say they were days that I felt like myself because I don't really know who I am. Which brings into question whether the things that have been upsetting to me all these years such as the things I have gone to therapy for...were they really upsetting me or was it the meds messing with my head? Obviously not going to ask my psychiatrist about this lol. I feel so sad and behind as I have had jobs but I want to start my "career" like my corporate career and just feel discouraged based on my age and feel the need to make up for lost time. All these years I've also really never had a serious romantic relationship, which I desire. I have also lost many friendships. I have one close friend. I still live at home and its not the best environment given the lack of emotional support. I am doing some casual work and want to begin applying for full time positions. But I have no idea what I want to do. And like I said, I feel so behind so there's a lot of pressure. I did manage to complete an undergrad (before having begun the taper lol). I also understand the need to taper slowly as I went down by 25mg and then after 2 weeks went down by another 25mg as advised by my psych and I was literally bedridden. It was so horrid. My mental health was amplified to 100%. I was riddled with anxiety. Would not wish that on my worst enemy.

Again, I am so sorry to read all this. My heart goes out to you. Being on these drugs from such a young age at such high doses, has no doubt played its role here.

 

On paper tapering large chunks at 25mg at a time, on the dose you were on, was not a terrible idea. We often talk about cutting the excess drug down more quickly first, before starting a slower taper. Clearly with you, this has been too much. As I said the theory doesn't always play out in reality.

 

2 hours ago, strengthinnumbers said:

I usually have a lot more to say but I would rather post and interact with you guys than hold off posting just to provide more detail into my current circumstances.

It's so hard to type out all the events of my life that led me to here but I'm glad and grateful to have found this community in order to feel just a little less alone throughout this process.

Thanks everyone for reading ❤️

No that is all fine. We have plenty of time to get to know you.

 

First of all, before I comment any further, could you take the time to edit your signature, in the format I mentioned above, and tell us all the doses you have been on, especially your recent taper. 

 

Secondly, could you tell us a bit about how you felt leading up to deciding to taper. Had things gotten worse for you?

Then whilst you tapered, how did you feel at the various drops?

 

Don't write this in your signature, just in a post. Just give us some more ideas about where you now.

 

Perhaps rate your symptoms out of 10 at various stages. 1 being mild, 10 very bad. It really helps us 🙂 

 

Another thing that is worth doing is writing your daily diary and posting it on here.

 

07.00 Woke up felt bad

08.00 Ate Toast

09.00 Took Sertraline 

And so on.

 

Can help us and you see patterns, and at times can tell us/you a lot!

 

In the mean time this is what I would do if I were you:

 

-Stay Hydrated 

 

-Eat a good clean whole food diet, avoiding processed foods and sugars.

 

-Stay away from caffeine, alcohol and antihistamines and any other psychoactive substances.

 

Supplements are to be avoided initially, as they often irritate our nervous systems. Try to get your nutrition through food.

 

Down the line, you may wish to introduce Fish Oil and Magnesium. Those who can tolerate them have found them calming to the nervous system. Be careful try one at a time and start low and see how you get on should you choose to try them.

 

A daily walk is very important as much as you can manage, if you can manage it. Gets you your fresh air and Vitamin D does wonders for your mind!

 

You are very welcome here and I hope you find the site supportive.

 

Chippy

Hello @strengthinnumbers, welcome to the forum! 💗

I am really sorry for all the suffering you wrote about.  It makes me angry to read that a 15 year old girl gets drugged in this way by the medical system. It is very normal to have a lot of problems in this age. I mean, it’s puberty! I felt suicidal, hated my body, was full of anxiety, etc., etc. when I was 15 and I believe that this is the case for many teenagers. (Actually, I would have needed therapy, which I didn’t get also.) I do not know what was done for you therapy wise , but all those drugs were probably a really bad idea. 
 

you probably have seen over at SA that this is not so rare. I have seen a couple of people who have been drugged really early and who had to learn to cope with their emotions and find their identity later in life. You will find your true self and it will be an exciting journey. I’m sure.

 

but first comes the tapering. I’m really sorry that you had already such a difficult start. Very wise of you to join this forum! You will find lots of help and good advice.

 

oh, and here I already have one: maybe you want to check this lady out. I have seen an interview with her and she seems to be very interesting and funny. She has also written a book.

 

https://www.brookesiem.com

“Brooke Siem was among the first generation of teens to be medicated with antidepressants. After spending half her life—and her entire adult life—on antidepressants, she wondered: Who might I be without them?”

 

 

 

Take care! Nemina

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Welcome @strengthinnumbers

This link may help:

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/forums/topic/33356-tips-for-tapering-sertraline-zoloft/?do=find comment& comment=13380

 

This person is a nurse practitioner that used to work with Outro Health if you are looking for someone to replace your psychiatrist. This is an option as well, if it becomes difficult to get your drug prescribed.

Mindful Medicine by Monica | Hyperbolic Tapering https://share.google/46VWI7EzcnlHPjU9m

She offers a free 15 minute consultation.

 

Glad you found us. ❤️🙏

 

 

 

 

Edited April 14Apr 14 by LostinCanada

hey @strengthinnumbers, I'm sorry about your experience with those drugs.

Could you include your doses at different times throughout your life and in the taper in your Signature?

Signature is a place you put your drug history, doses at different times, supplements and tapering, not describe your story.

Hi @strengthinnumbers  I was diagnosed with OCD as well as anxiety disorder.  Have you looked into Exposure Response Prevention (ERP) as a way to manage your OCD thoughts? I found it really works because it doesn't try to make you stop having obsessive thoughts, but it teaches you that you don't have to act on them.  After a while, it just robs them of their power.  I'd strongly recommend you look into if you haven't already. 

Just popping on to say Welcome ,it's a place where everyone understands and nothing is ever too silly sounding .😊

Welcome to the forum.

For many, finding support communities and starting a taper already knowing that they must go slowly and cautiously, is enough to prevent significantly worsening during tapering.

Many of those who are here and experiencing severe symptoms are those who didn't know any better until they found out the very hard way, and that's when they found prescribed harm communities.

I'd suggest having a read through this topic as a starting point:

Tapering Information - Tapering - The Antidepressant Harm and Recovery Forum

You'll find further topics in that forum, that you may also wish to read, but this one is a good overview. You'll likely find that the pace of tapering, and the sizes of dose reductions, are far smaller than what many doctors recommend whilst insisting that no harm is possible.

How are you doing, @strengthinnumbers ?

I apologize, I'm like excessively confused and I'm sure as you all know...tapering can really take it's toll on mental capacity lol so if someone is able to provide direct instructions that would be extremely useful. I haven't yet brought myself to read the guidelines just because of the anxiety im experiencing and overwhelm.

15 minutes ago, strengthinnumbers said:

I apologize, I'm like excessively confused and I'm sure as you all know...tapering can really take it's toll on mental capacity lol so if someone is able to provide direct instructions that would be extremely useful. I haven't yet brought myself to read the guidelines just because of the anxiety im experiencing and overwhelm.

Nothing to appologise for.

Of course we can help as much as you need.

-First thing is first. Can you tell us your approx dose reductions and the dates? Just best you can remember. 😀

-Then can you tell us, how you felt just before you started reducing? How you felt during the various reductions?

It is so helpful for us to understand.

Try to rate the symptoms out of 10 at the various stages. Nothing too complicated, as simple as you need is fine.

It sounds like you are not very stable (symptoms wise) at the moment. That implies you should hold here for the minute potentially. But a little more information, would help us understand a bit more, and help us advise. 😀

We are all here to help. Feel free to post here about your day and interact with everyone, if that is helpful, there are lots of very kind people on this site, we are all here for each other.

Chippy