53 minutes ago, Lighty said:

it's all temporary, it's important to just let the symptoms take over and 'surrender' to them in a way instead of fighting them when they are too strong, makes it 10x easier, either way you got this as you are improving.

I have been trying to allow more which can be hard in a wave but I'm not letting symptoms control me as much. I let them sit on my shoulder while I get on with things, I don't do this perfectly but I keep practicing it as well as I can 🙏

19 hours ago, Troy021079 said:

I let them sit on my shoulder while I get on with things, I don't do this perfectly but I keep practicing it as well as I can 🙏

Nobody does Troy, the perfect way is to do it imperfectly but keep trying. As you say, all we can do.

12 minutes ago, Chippy said:

Nobody does Troy, the perfect way is to do it imperfectly but keep trying. As you say, all we can do.

It's so hard to do sometimes, especially in a wave when symptoms are screaming at you. It hits even harder after a good period!

37 minutes ago, Troy021079 said:

It's so hard to do sometimes, especially in a wave when symptoms are screaming at you. It hits even harder after a good period!

It is, you have the perfect attitude, you accept it is hard but keep trying all the same.

23 minutes ago, Chippy said:

It is, you have the perfect attitude, you accept it is hard but keep trying all the same.

Something like, it's hard today but I'm still going to work and doing my thing.

Why does a wave always feel like a step back and that it's endless, does anyone else feel this when they're in one? Sorry, struggling a bit with this as I really thought I turned a corner until this bloody flare.

8 minutes ago, Troy021079 said:

Why does a wave always feel like a step back and that it's endless, does anyone else feel this when they're in one? Sorry, struggling a bit with this as I really thought I turned a corner until this bloody flare.

Yeah unfortunately this is really common and normal. Loads of times I thought I'd turned a corner and when I got hit again was devastated.

Just know the good times will come again and eventually start to last longer.

Think almost everyone here can relate to this. ❤️

You'll get there again

Absolutely 100%!!!!

It feels like it will never end, and that you will be like this for the rest of your life.

The waves should eventually start getting shorter and the windows longer.

Keep persevering.

Wombat

Thanks for everyone's words, it means a lot. I guess I'm also disappointed as I thought I'd be further along than what I am, especially after such a short time on the drugs. I don't hear much about short term use and reactions.

Edited August 17Aug 17 by Troy021079

56 minutes ago, Troy021079 said:

Thanks for everyone's words, it means a lot. I guess I'm also disappointed as I thought I'd be further along than what I am, especially after such a short time on the drugs. I don't hear much about short term use and reactions.

There are loads of us who used these drugs short term and are still having issues, even one pill. You are doing better than you think and given some more time I think you will be doing better still.

10 minutes ago, Chippy said:

There are loads of us who used these drugs short term and are still having issues, even one pill. You are doing better than you think and given some more time I think you will be doing better still.

Thanks @Chippy I guess it's my wave brain talking a bit. I know I've made good improvements, it just seems out of proportion the amount of time taking those **** drugs to the time it takes to heal 😬

5 minutes ago, Troy021079 said:

it just seems out of proportion the amount of time taking those **** drugs to the time it takes to heal 😬

Unfortunately often there is no correlation between the two.

Still in this wave after about 3 weeks 😢 some windows creep in but aren't holding like my last 5 week window. It really feels like it's come crashing down 🙁

Someone said I full under a kindling injury given my history of coming sertraline then back on the other ****** drugs. I don't fully understand what kindling is?

1 hour ago, Troy021079 said:

Still in this wave after about 3 weeks 😢 some windows creep in but aren't holding like my last 5 week window. It really feels like it's come crashing down 🙁

Someone said I full under a kindling injury given my history of coming sertraline then back on the other ****** drugs. I don't fully understand what kindling is?

Sorry to hear that youre still in a wave. Sending lots of support! From my understanding, kindling is when your nervous system has become sensitized by a drug and then adding further drugs sensitizes it more and more, making everything worse. So lets say for example youve been on sertraline. You taper off it with the doctor's instructions and you feel fine. Then later you go back on sertraline again and taper off again. all of a sudden you start getting bad withdrawal that you didint get the first time. I think that it also applies to start up symptoms.

1 hour ago, Troy021079 said:

Still in this wave after about 3 weeks 😢 some windows creep in but aren't holding like my last 5 week window. It really feels like it's come crashing down 🙁

Sorry to read, this process can be so cruel, better days will come.

1 hour ago, Troy021079 said:

Someone said I full under a kindling injury given my history of coming sertraline then back on the other ****** drugs. I don't fully understand what kindling is?

The term comes from the alcohol community. I see it as literally as dry wood prepping for a bigger fire. So every move that is made, starting a drug, stopping a drug, adding in more drugs, increasing the dose, all adds more fuel or kindling to the fire and helps the flames grow bigger and bigger.

49 minutes ago, Chippy said:

Sorry to read, this process can be so cruel, better days will come.

The term comes from the alcohol community. I see it as literally as dry wood prepping for a bigger fire. So every move that is made, starting a drug, stopping a drug, adding in more drugs, increasing the dose, all adds more fuel or kindling to the fire and helps the flames grow bigger and bigger.

What are your thoughts on the permanence of kindling? Is it reversible or do you think that once it happens, the sensitivity will be there for the rest of your life? let me know if i should move this question to my own thread!

2 minutes ago, Some0n3 said:

What are your thoughts on the permanence of kindling? Is it reversible or do you think that once it happens, the sensitivity will be there for the rest of your life? let me know if i should move this question to my own thread!

I dont see it as a scary thing you catch just the description of continued nervous system sensitivity irritation. The body is strong and smart and designed to heal! :)

16 minutes ago, Chippy said:

I dont see it as a scary thing you catch just the description of continued nervous system sensitivity irritation. The body is strong and smart and designed to heal! :)

Thanks for the answer!

1 hour ago, Chippy said:

I dont see it as a scary thing you catch just the description of continued nervous system sensitivity irritation. The body is strong and smart and designed to heal! :)

I was told I would heal, it'll just take time if this is the case, this being from a prominent therapist who has been through withdrawal and helps a lot of people. When you're in a wave it sure feels like it's forever.

Question. 5 week window with some symptoms but going well, back in the gym also going well, went in to wave about 3 weeks ago with some windows but I'm more reactive now to exercise and stress. Is this a normal Windows wave thing or could it be I've gone backwards as I'm not tolerating things I use to to a certain degree. Thanks in advance.

Edited August 25Aug 25 by Troy021079
Typo

Sounds like a wave to me. What you want to avoid is falling into the trap of measuring your recovery in the short term. It takes place over months, and you’re doing better than you were months ago. That’s progress despite the waves that may come. Every time you move forward by challenging yourself, you’re bound to experience some reactivity. You’re really doing well!

1 hour ago, mstimc60 said:

Sounds like a wave to me. What you want to avoid is falling into the trap of measuring your recovery in the short term. It takes place over months, and you’re doing better than you were months ago. That’s progress despite the waves that may come. Every time you move forward by challenging yourself, you’re bound to experience some reactivity. You’re really doing well!

Thanks @mstimc60 that's a good way of of putting it. I guess after that window (which wasn't perfect) it feels devastating being more sensitive and what feels like going backwards.

This wave feels a bit different, normally I'd get a wave, feel activated for 2 or 3 weeks and settle, this one is fluctuating all over the place. My normal gym routine has been toned down, stress is hitting a bit harder and morning anxiety has increased again etc 🤦 not the pattern I'm use to and if I'm honest, it does scare you a bit.

Edited August 25Aug 25 by Troy021079
Mistakes

6 hours ago, Troy021079 said:

This wave feels a bit different, normally I'd get a wave, feel activated for 2 or 3 weeks and settle, this one is fluctuating all over the place. My normal gym routine has been toned down, stress is hitting a bit harder and morning anxiety has increased again etc 🤦 not the pattern I'm use to and if I'm honest, it does scare you a bit.

Hey @Troy021079, it's totally normal for waves to feel different from one another. I don't think patterns last long in WD to be honest. Often we think we've found a pattern and it lasts for a little while, but then it changes or disappears. WD is so unpredictable for all of us, but what we do know is that the waves will lift and relief will come again.

14 hours ago, SarahMc said:

Hey @Troy021079, it's totally normal for waves to feel different from one another. I don't think patterns last long in WD to be honest. Often we think we've found a pattern and it lasts for a little while, but then it changes or disappears. WD is so unpredictable for all of us, but what we do know is that the waves will lift and relief will come again.

This wave is kicking my ass, I can't even do a light workout without it escalatiing, it's fluctuating up and down with adrenaline surges, worst one I've had in a while 😔

I have had more anger and frustration kicking in lately also, I'm ready to move forward but being held back by an uncooperative cns.