Chuey: Paxil (PaxHell) for 23 years

March 31Mar 31

4 hours ago, Chuey said:

A little more than a week of a Window... Now back in Hell... Fear of losing my children, horrible mental images and thoughts, depression, anger. I think this is what it will be like from now on. Brief Windows then back to hellish Waves....the Windows are actually cruel... making me think that I'm actually going to get out of this....only to go back into Waves. This has ruined my life.

Don't believe what your mind is rambling now @Chuey nasty chemical wave, stay strong against it, easier said than done I know but it will pass and beautiful window will soon arrive again.

I'm sorry you're struggling so much! sending you lots of strength and peace.

1998 forced on cipramil *no anxiety/depression background*

Over the years all kinds of SSRI/SNRI/antipsychotics/stabilizers due to apparently side effects/withdrawal

Many attempts to quit over the years with failure (extremely rapid taper followed by doctors' guidens)

Current attempt-Paxil 20 mg:

6/24 20 mg to 5 mg-severe AKA

9/24 Increase to 20-AKA continues

10/24 stopped completely-AKA out of control

11/24 Zoloft bridge attempt-25 mg to 75 mg+Seroquel-AKA continued-stopped them CT.

12/24 Back on Paxil 10mg (0.1789g)-some stabilization-from here tapered by about 30% each time (don't remember doses and dates).

2025 - 7.10 0.0558g (3.11mg)/7.11 3% 0.0541g (3.02mg)/4.12 1% 0.0535g (2.98mg)

2026 - 3.1 1.5% 0.0526g (2.93mg)/9.1 8.5% 0.0480g (2.68mg)/16.2 1.8% 0.0470g (2.62mg)/21.3 1% 0.466 (2.60mg)/23.4 2.2% 0.455g (2.54mg)/8.7 20% 0.0358g (2mg)

Supplements:

Magnesium Glycinate - started 28.5.26 1 capsule 200mg in the morning - Increased brain fog and muscle stiffness - stopped after two weeks.

Iron - liquid, quarter of recommended dose - increased anxiety and burning sensation - stopped after two weeks.

Saffron - started 8.7.26 1 capsule 30mg in the morning - pretty immediate improvement in terms of anxiety and sleep that seems to continue to improve.

1
1

March 31Mar 31

@Chuey I know it's hard but the waves are such a necessary part of healing. Have you ever watched the video in this link? It reminds me that some serious recalibration is going on which means we are getting closer to being healed.

https://antidepressantrecovery.org/topic/179-are-you-in-a-wave/

I am not a medical professional. My comments are based on my personal experience and information on SA.

Paroxetine-2002 onward-20mg/ Citalopram-2007-20 mg-straight switch from paroxetine-back to paroxetine after a month/ Sertraline -25 mg-Dec 2016- given for a month instead of paroxetine (doctor mistake) Oxazepam -10 mg-2016-twice weekly for a couple months for sleep/ Zopiclone -3.75-7.5mg-2020-2022-once a week for sleep/Paroxetine -20 yr+/ Dec2018-May 2022 20 mg/ May 2022 30mg/2022.07.28-2022.08.24 30mg to 0mg/ Prozac-10mg August 24-29 2022/Paroxetine -5mg-2022.11.28-2022.12.04/10mg-Dec 5&6/22/ Prozac-10mg-Dec 8&9/22/Paroxetine -5mg-2022.12.07 to 2023.07.01

TAPER-Paroxetine-2023-Jul 2-4.9mg/ Jul 21-4.8mg/Jul 28-4.73mg/Aug 4-4.65mg /Sep 21-4.58 mg/Oct 27-4.56 mg/Dec 5-4.54 mg/2024-Jan 2-4.52 mg/Jan 9-4.51 mg/Jan 17-4.49 mg/Jan 26-4.47mg/Feb 6-4.46mg/Feb 19-4.44mg /Apr 4-4.43mg/Apr 28-4.4 mg/May 5-4.39 mg/May 19-4.36 mg/Jul 2-4.34 mg/Jul 9-4.32mg/Jul 31-4.3 mg/Oct 1-4.29mg/Nov 27-4.25 mg/Dec 5-4.22mg/2025-Jan 5-4.17mg/Feb 2-4.1mg/Mar 7-4.07mg/Apr 23-4.04mg/May 23-4mg/Jun 22-3.99mg/Jun 30-3.95mg/Jul 18-3.92mg/Sep 25-3.9mg/2026-Mar 25-3.85mg

9am-paroxetine, 200mg mag bisglycinate/75 mg DGL if needed for refux/200mg calcium citrate/algae oil for omega 3/ginger 400 mg as needed for nausea

"... your strength will be in keeping calm..."-Isaiah 30:15

1

March 31Mar 31

Author

13 hours ago, Chippy said:

I’m so sorry to read this @Chuey yes I agree the up and down nature of healing from all this is possibly the worst thing. Cruel. Hang in there! More windows coming and they will be longer and brighter as time passes. We are all here for you. Chippy

Thanks @Chippy! Much appreciated.

1995: Started Paxil for depression, which resolved. Paxil was subsequently discontinued in 1996.

2001: Reinstated 10mg for AM Anxiety. Gradually built up to 50mg.

2008-2017: Buspar

2012-2017: Ativan

2016-2020: Several failed attempts to get off paxil through guesstimated tapering.

2020/2021: Began "slower" tapering/holding of paxil but the reductions in dosage were still too much at 6.25mg per reduction.

June 2024: Last paxil dose of 6.25mg. Within 3 weeks, began experiencing a multitude of severe physical, mental and emotional symptoms.

Supplements:

Magnesium Glycinate 420mg 4x/day

Fish oil

Cannabis

1

March 31Mar 31

Author

10 hours ago, Fullhealing said:

Don't believe what your mind is rambling now @Chuey nasty chemical wave, stay strong against it, easier said than done I know but it will pass and beautiful window will soon arrive again.

I'm sorry you're struggling so much! sending you lots of strength and peace.

Thank you @Fullhealing! Through this process I've been up and down in my belief that I would actually heal and eventually be out of this misery . I'm really starting to wonder if it's just going to be part of my "life" from now on???

1995: Started Paxil for depression, which resolved. Paxil was subsequently discontinued in 1996.

2001: Reinstated 10mg for AM Anxiety. Gradually built up to 50mg.

2008-2017: Buspar

2012-2017: Ativan

2016-2020: Several failed attempts to get off paxil through guesstimated tapering.

2020/2021: Began "slower" tapering/holding of paxil but the reductions in dosage were still too much at 6.25mg per reduction.

June 2024: Last paxil dose of 6.25mg. Within 3 weeks, began experiencing a multitude of severe physical, mental and emotional symptoms.

Supplements:

Magnesium Glycinate 420mg 4x/day

Fish oil

Cannabis

1

March 31Mar 31

Author

2 hours ago, LostinCanada said:

@Chuey I know it's hard but the waves are such a necessary part of healing. Have you ever watched the video in this link? It reminds me that some serious recalibration is going on which means we are getting closer to being healed.

https://antidepressantrecovery.org/topic/179-are-you-in-a-wave/

Thank you @LostinCanada! It's been nearly 2 years since being completely off paxil. I have seen a lot of recalibration take place but I just never thought it would take this long... and still have so much farther to go. My hope is decent during the Windows, but the Windows are pretty short lived. So overall, my hope is pretty well depleted at this point. 😞

I tried to watch the video you sent but apparently it is blocked in the US due to copyright issues.

1995: Started Paxil for depression, which resolved. Paxil was subsequently discontinued in 1996.

2001: Reinstated 10mg for AM Anxiety. Gradually built up to 50mg.

2008-2017: Buspar

2012-2017: Ativan

2016-2020: Several failed attempts to get off paxil through guesstimated tapering.

2020/2021: Began "slower" tapering/holding of paxil but the reductions in dosage were still too much at 6.25mg per reduction.

June 2024: Last paxil dose of 6.25mg. Within 3 weeks, began experiencing a multitude of severe physical, mental and emotional symptoms.

Supplements:

Magnesium Glycinate 420mg 4x/day

Fish oil

Cannabis

March 31Mar 31

35 minutes ago, Chuey said:

tried to watch the video you sent but apparently it is blocked in the US due to copyright issues.

Dang...it is now blocked for me as well...it was my go to because it was so good....grrr

It likened our bodies to the Rubik's cube. When one area gets adjusted, it messes up other areas and then those areas need to be recalibrated.

This journey takes longer than any of us thought possible. Thankfully you are off the rotten drug and healing is happening.

The windows show we are getting there. ❤️🙏

I am not a medical professional. My comments are based on my personal experience and information on SA.

Paroxetine-2002 onward-20mg/ Citalopram-2007-20 mg-straight switch from paroxetine-back to paroxetine after a month/ Sertraline -25 mg-Dec 2016- given for a month instead of paroxetine (doctor mistake) Oxazepam -10 mg-2016-twice weekly for a couple months for sleep/ Zopiclone -3.75-7.5mg-2020-2022-once a week for sleep/Paroxetine -20 yr+/ Dec2018-May 2022 20 mg/ May 2022 30mg/2022.07.28-2022.08.24 30mg to 0mg/ Prozac-10mg August 24-29 2022/Paroxetine -5mg-2022.11.28-2022.12.04/10mg-Dec 5&6/22/ Prozac-10mg-Dec 8&9/22/Paroxetine -5mg-2022.12.07 to 2023.07.01

TAPER-Paroxetine-2023-Jul 2-4.9mg/ Jul 21-4.8mg/Jul 28-4.73mg/Aug 4-4.65mg /Sep 21-4.58 mg/Oct 27-4.56 mg/Dec 5-4.54 mg/2024-Jan 2-4.52 mg/Jan 9-4.51 mg/Jan 17-4.49 mg/Jan 26-4.47mg/Feb 6-4.46mg/Feb 19-4.44mg /Apr 4-4.43mg/Apr 28-4.4 mg/May 5-4.39 mg/May 19-4.36 mg/Jul 2-4.34 mg/Jul 9-4.32mg/Jul 31-4.3 mg/Oct 1-4.29mg/Nov 27-4.25 mg/Dec 5-4.22mg/2025-Jan 5-4.17mg/Feb 2-4.1mg/Mar 7-4.07mg/Apr 23-4.04mg/May 23-4mg/Jun 22-3.99mg/Jun 30-3.95mg/Jul 18-3.92mg/Sep 25-3.9mg/2026-Mar 25-3.85mg

9am-paroxetine, 200mg mag bisglycinate/75 mg DGL if needed for refux/200mg calcium citrate/algae oil for omega 3/ginger 400 mg as needed for nausea

"... your strength will be in keeping calm..."-Isaiah 30:15

1

March 31Mar 31

3 minutes ago, LostinCanada said:

Dang...it is now blocked for me as well...it was my go to because it was so good....grrr

It likened our bodies to the Rubik's cube. When one area gets adjusted, it messes up other areas and then those areas need to be recalibrated.

This journey takes longer than any of us thought possible. Thankfully you are off the rotten drug and healing is happening.

The windows show we are getting there. ❤️🙏

Me too. Maybe a free vpn and try a few different locations…..

I’m not a medical professional and cannot offer medical advice. I only offer my thoughts as support. Please speak to your health practitioner about your care. This is a peer site where we support each other on our taper/recovery journeys.

If you are from the UK please make sure you fill in a 'Yellow Card' report for the MHRA. It is you doing your bit to help make a difference.

Please take the time to do it today 🙂 https://yellowcard.mhra.gov.uk

For US members details here.

March 31Mar 31

1 hour ago, Chuey said:

Thank you @Fullhealing! Through this process I've been up and down in my belief that I would actually heal and eventually be out of this misery . I'm really starting to wonder if it's just going to be part of my "life" from now on???

Probably for a while, yes, until the system reaches a stable and healthy base @Chuey but until then we also have windows, something to hold on to. eventually I do believe that we will come out of this much stronger in a beautiful life, it just takes longer than we expected unfortunately.

Keep fighting bravely, bright long window is awaiting 💞

Edited March 31Mar 31 by Fullhealing

1998 forced on cipramil *no anxiety/depression background*

Over the years all kinds of SSRI/SNRI/antipsychotics/stabilizers due to apparently side effects/withdrawal

Many attempts to quit over the years with failure (extremely rapid taper followed by doctors' guidens)

Current attempt-Paxil 20 mg:

6/24 20 mg to 5 mg-severe AKA

9/24 Increase to 20-AKA continues

10/24 stopped completely-AKA out of control

11/24 Zoloft bridge attempt-25 mg to 75 mg+Seroquel-AKA continued-stopped them CT.

12/24 Back on Paxil 10mg (0.1789g)-some stabilization-from here tapered by about 30% each time (don't remember doses and dates).

2025 - 7.10 0.0558g (3.11mg)/7.11 3% 0.0541g (3.02mg)/4.12 1% 0.0535g (2.98mg)

2026 - 3.1 1.5% 0.0526g (2.93mg)/9.1 8.5% 0.0480g (2.68mg)/16.2 1.8% 0.0470g (2.62mg)/21.3 1% 0.466 (2.60mg)/23.4 2.2% 0.455g (2.54mg)/8.7 20% 0.0358g (2mg)

Supplements:

Magnesium Glycinate - started 28.5.26 1 capsule 200mg in the morning - Increased brain fog and muscle stiffness - stopped after two weeks.

Iron - liquid, quarter of recommended dose - increased anxiety and burning sensation - stopped after two weeks.

Saffron - started 8.7.26 1 capsule 30mg in the morning - pretty immediate improvement in terms of anxiety and sleep that seems to continue to improve.

April 1Apr 1

Chuey, my heart goes out to you. Your body knows what it's looking for as evidenced by your windows. There is apparently more restructuring to be done as evidenced by the waves. Your body is working hard to sort this out. You are on your way. Don't lose heart.

xxoo Jamie

Sept 1993 Began paroxetine 20 mg for anxiety and depression- worked like a charm.

1st taper - Aug 1995 tapered over 3 weeks before getting pregnant- great at first, crashed at one month. White knuckled it through 2 miscarriages. Spring 1996 (?) Reinstated paroxetine 20 mg.

2nd taper- Spring 2008 tapered off paroxetine over 4 months. Summer 2008 crashed horribly, nearly incapacitated by WD; Summer 2008-Summer 2009 tried 4 different ADs, none as effective as paroxetine. Summer 2009 Reinstated 20 mg paroxetine, not as effective as previously.

3rd taper- Jun 19, 2019 began 10 mg paroxetine, 10 mg fluoxetine for one week. Jun 26 20 mg fluoxetine, 5 mg paroxetine for one week. Jul 3- 20 mg fluoxetine + lorazepam (0.5 mg) as needed up to 2x/day. Aug 12- 30 mg fluox; Sept 3- .5 mg clonazepam daily; end lorazepam; Sept 5- 40 mg fluox;

End of 2019- returned to paroxetine 20 mg/day most of the year, 30mg/day in the winter.

BEGIN 4th TAPER ATTEMPT: Jul 13 2025- 30 -> 25 mg; 10 Sept -> 22.5mg; 3 Oct -> 20 mg; 10 Oct -> hold 2 weeks; 2 Nov -> 19.5 mg; 9 Nov -> 19 mg; 16 Nov -> hold 1 week; 22 Nov -> 18.6 mg; 30 Nov -> 18.2 mg; 7 Dec -> hold 1 week; 14 Dec -> 17.8 mg; 21 Dec -> 17.5 mg; 28 Dec -> 17.1 mg; 4 Jan 2026 -> 16.7 mg -> hold 2 weeks ; 28 Jan -> 16.4 mg; 1 Feb -> 16.0 mg; 8 Feb -> 15.7 mg; 15 Feb -> hold 2 weeks; 1 Mar -> 15.5 mg; 8 Mar -> 15.2 mg; 15 Mar -> hold; 5 Apr -> 14.9.

Supplements: Vit D, Magesium L-threonate, Vit C, Zinc, Melatonin, Multivitamin

1

April 1Apr 1

Author

13 hours ago, gardengirl2 said:

Chuey, my heart goes out to you. Your body knows what it's looking for as evidenced by your windows. There is apparently more restructuring to be done as evidenced by the waves. Your body is working hard to sort this out. You are on your way. Don't lose heart.

xxoo Jamie

Thanks Jamie. I've heard a lot of the theories of the healing process involving waves and windows. For me, it seems more like I've been reduced to being stuck in a continuous loop with as much improvement as I'm likely to see. I had hope that the waves would eventually end, but I just don't know anymore.

1995: Started Paxil for depression, which resolved. Paxil was subsequently discontinued in 1996.

2001: Reinstated 10mg for AM Anxiety. Gradually built up to 50mg.

2008-2017: Buspar

2012-2017: Ativan

2016-2020: Several failed attempts to get off paxil through guesstimated tapering.

2020/2021: Began "slower" tapering/holding of paxil but the reductions in dosage were still too much at 6.25mg per reduction.

June 2024: Last paxil dose of 6.25mg. Within 3 weeks, began experiencing a multitude of severe physical, mental and emotional symptoms.

Supplements:

Magnesium Glycinate 420mg 4x/day

Fish oil

Cannabis

April 1Apr 1

Author

22 hours ago, LostinCanada said:

Dang...it is now blocked for me as well...it was my go to because it was so good....grrr

It likened our bodies to the Rubik's cube. When one area gets adjusted, it messes up other areas and then those areas need to be recalibrated.

This journey takes longer than any of us thought possible. Thankfully you are off the rotten drug and healing is happening.

The windows show we are getting there. ❤️🙏

It makes sense, but I just don't know if it'll ever be any better than it is now.

1995: Started Paxil for depression, which resolved. Paxil was subsequently discontinued in 1996.

2001: Reinstated 10mg for AM Anxiety. Gradually built up to 50mg.

2008-2017: Buspar

2012-2017: Ativan

2016-2020: Several failed attempts to get off paxil through guesstimated tapering.

2020/2021: Began "slower" tapering/holding of paxil but the reductions in dosage were still too much at 6.25mg per reduction.

June 2024: Last paxil dose of 6.25mg. Within 3 weeks, began experiencing a multitude of severe physical, mental and emotional symptoms.

Supplements:

Magnesium Glycinate 420mg 4x/day

Fish oil

Cannabis

April 1Apr 1

31 minutes ago, Chuey said:

just don't know if it'll ever be any better than it is now.

Everyone that has healed has said the same thing. We have to look beyond the hopeless feeling and remember our bodies know how to do the impossible.

I am not a medical professional. My comments are based on my personal experience and information on SA.

Paroxetine-2002 onward-20mg/ Citalopram-2007-20 mg-straight switch from paroxetine-back to paroxetine after a month/ Sertraline -25 mg-Dec 2016- given for a month instead of paroxetine (doctor mistake) Oxazepam -10 mg-2016-twice weekly for a couple months for sleep/ Zopiclone -3.75-7.5mg-2020-2022-once a week for sleep/Paroxetine -20 yr+/ Dec2018-May 2022 20 mg/ May 2022 30mg/2022.07.28-2022.08.24 30mg to 0mg/ Prozac-10mg August 24-29 2022/Paroxetine -5mg-2022.11.28-2022.12.04/10mg-Dec 5&6/22/ Prozac-10mg-Dec 8&9/22/Paroxetine -5mg-2022.12.07 to 2023.07.01

TAPER-Paroxetine-2023-Jul 2-4.9mg/ Jul 21-4.8mg/Jul 28-4.73mg/Aug 4-4.65mg /Sep 21-4.58 mg/Oct 27-4.56 mg/Dec 5-4.54 mg/2024-Jan 2-4.52 mg/Jan 9-4.51 mg/Jan 17-4.49 mg/Jan 26-4.47mg/Feb 6-4.46mg/Feb 19-4.44mg /Apr 4-4.43mg/Apr 28-4.4 mg/May 5-4.39 mg/May 19-4.36 mg/Jul 2-4.34 mg/Jul 9-4.32mg/Jul 31-4.3 mg/Oct 1-4.29mg/Nov 27-4.25 mg/Dec 5-4.22mg/2025-Jan 5-4.17mg/Feb 2-4.1mg/Mar 7-4.07mg/Apr 23-4.04mg/May 23-4mg/Jun 22-3.99mg/Jun 30-3.95mg/Jul 18-3.92mg/Sep 25-3.9mg/2026-Mar 25-3.85mg

9am-paroxetine, 200mg mag bisglycinate/75 mg DGL if needed for refux/200mg calcium citrate/algae oil for omega 3/ginger 400 mg as needed for nausea

"... your strength will be in keeping calm..."-Isaiah 30:15

1

April 1Apr 1

Author

4 hours ago, LostinCanada said:

Everyone that has healed has said the same thing. We have to look beyond the hopeless feeling and remember our bodies know how to do the impossible.

Yeah I've read that, and it has been a source of encouragement. It's just becoming increasingly harder to imagine NOT being in this mess... I've become so use to living this hell. I hate being so negative... I use to be a pretty positive person overall.

1995: Started Paxil for depression, which resolved. Paxil was subsequently discontinued in 1996.

2001: Reinstated 10mg for AM Anxiety. Gradually built up to 50mg.

2008-2017: Buspar

2012-2017: Ativan

2016-2020: Several failed attempts to get off paxil through guesstimated tapering.

2020/2021: Began "slower" tapering/holding of paxil but the reductions in dosage were still too much at 6.25mg per reduction.

June 2024: Last paxil dose of 6.25mg. Within 3 weeks, began experiencing a multitude of severe physical, mental and emotional symptoms.

Supplements:

Magnesium Glycinate 420mg 4x/day

Fish oil

Cannabis

April 1Apr 1

It's okay @Chuey

It's hard not to be negative...who would ever dream that listening to a dr would put us in this position. We just can't let Big Pharma win. One day closer to healing. You are closer than me...once off, some see massive improvement at 2 years, some at three❤️🙏

I am not a medical professional. My comments are based on my personal experience and information on SA.

Paroxetine-2002 onward-20mg/ Citalopram-2007-20 mg-straight switch from paroxetine-back to paroxetine after a month/ Sertraline -25 mg-Dec 2016- given for a month instead of paroxetine (doctor mistake) Oxazepam -10 mg-2016-twice weekly for a couple months for sleep/ Zopiclone -3.75-7.5mg-2020-2022-once a week for sleep/Paroxetine -20 yr+/ Dec2018-May 2022 20 mg/ May 2022 30mg/2022.07.28-2022.08.24 30mg to 0mg/ Prozac-10mg August 24-29 2022/Paroxetine -5mg-2022.11.28-2022.12.04/10mg-Dec 5&6/22/ Prozac-10mg-Dec 8&9/22/Paroxetine -5mg-2022.12.07 to 2023.07.01

TAPER-Paroxetine-2023-Jul 2-4.9mg/ Jul 21-4.8mg/Jul 28-4.73mg/Aug 4-4.65mg /Sep 21-4.58 mg/Oct 27-4.56 mg/Dec 5-4.54 mg/2024-Jan 2-4.52 mg/Jan 9-4.51 mg/Jan 17-4.49 mg/Jan 26-4.47mg/Feb 6-4.46mg/Feb 19-4.44mg /Apr 4-4.43mg/Apr 28-4.4 mg/May 5-4.39 mg/May 19-4.36 mg/Jul 2-4.34 mg/Jul 9-4.32mg/Jul 31-4.3 mg/Oct 1-4.29mg/Nov 27-4.25 mg/Dec 5-4.22mg/2025-Jan 5-4.17mg/Feb 2-4.1mg/Mar 7-4.07mg/Apr 23-4.04mg/May 23-4mg/Jun 22-3.99mg/Jun 30-3.95mg/Jul 18-3.92mg/Sep 25-3.9mg/2026-Mar 25-3.85mg

9am-paroxetine, 200mg mag bisglycinate/75 mg DGL if needed for refux/200mg calcium citrate/algae oil for omega 3/ginger 400 mg as needed for nausea

"... your strength will be in keeping calm..."-Isaiah 30:15

1

April 2Apr 2

@Chuey, I honestly don't see yours as a permanent situation. You are not in homeostasis as your body is going between the two extremes. It is working on your behalf. Keep the faith, friend. I'm rootin for you and will be following your progress, eagerly awaiting the day the window doesn't stop. 🙏🌻

Sept 1993 Began paroxetine 20 mg for anxiety and depression- worked like a charm.

1st taper - Aug 1995 tapered over 3 weeks before getting pregnant- great at first, crashed at one month. White knuckled it through 2 miscarriages. Spring 1996 (?) Reinstated paroxetine 20 mg.

2nd taper- Spring 2008 tapered off paroxetine over 4 months. Summer 2008 crashed horribly, nearly incapacitated by WD; Summer 2008-Summer 2009 tried 4 different ADs, none as effective as paroxetine. Summer 2009 Reinstated 20 mg paroxetine, not as effective as previously.

3rd taper- Jun 19, 2019 began 10 mg paroxetine, 10 mg fluoxetine for one week. Jun 26 20 mg fluoxetine, 5 mg paroxetine for one week. Jul 3- 20 mg fluoxetine + lorazepam (0.5 mg) as needed up to 2x/day. Aug 12- 30 mg fluox; Sept 3- .5 mg clonazepam daily; end lorazepam; Sept 5- 40 mg fluox;

End of 2019- returned to paroxetine 20 mg/day most of the year, 30mg/day in the winter.

BEGIN 4th TAPER ATTEMPT: Jul 13 2025- 30 -> 25 mg; 10 Sept -> 22.5mg; 3 Oct -> 20 mg; 10 Oct -> hold 2 weeks; 2 Nov -> 19.5 mg; 9 Nov -> 19 mg; 16 Nov -> hold 1 week; 22 Nov -> 18.6 mg; 30 Nov -> 18.2 mg; 7 Dec -> hold 1 week; 14 Dec -> 17.8 mg; 21 Dec -> 17.5 mg; 28 Dec -> 17.1 mg; 4 Jan 2026 -> 16.7 mg -> hold 2 weeks ; 28 Jan -> 16.4 mg; 1 Feb -> 16.0 mg; 8 Feb -> 15.7 mg; 15 Feb -> hold 2 weeks; 1 Mar -> 15.5 mg; 8 Mar -> 15.2 mg; 15 Mar -> hold; 5 Apr -> 14.9.

Supplements: Vit D, Magesium L-threonate, Vit C, Zinc, Melatonin, Multivitamin

1

April 2Apr 2

21 hours ago, Chuey said:

Yeah I've read that, and it has been a source of encouragement. It's just becoming increasingly harder to imagine NOT being in this mess... I've become so use to living this hell. I hate being so negative... I use to be a pretty positive person overall.

I felt the way you did. It seemed others were making progress while I was stuck in a cycle of negative thinking and hopelessness. I can assure you that, although it will take time, you will recover. We are so much stronger than our anxious mind wants us to think. There's a stream of psychology/philosophy that says the Universe sends us what we're interested in, even if what we're interested in isn't want we want. Our anxious minds want to keep us trapped in a negative thought cycle, and our brain responds by thinking even more negatively. Its a hard cycle to break, but you can do it. You can start with things as simple as repeating positive affirmations like "I am lucky to have found this support site and people who've been through what I'm experiencing" and then "I know I will recover no matter how long it takes". Focusing on positive things breaks the negativity cycle. It may take time and will take effort, but you can recover!

Started Paxil for GAD in 1999

Unsuccessful taper attempt in 2006

Paxilprogress helped with a successful taper completed in 2009

Using therapy and CBT to manage my anxiety

I offer advice based on my experience. Nothing I share is intended to be medical or therapy advice.

1

April 3Apr 3

Author

I appreciate all the encouragement.

Overall I'm way better than I was when it was in the thick of it. The Waves had increasingly become less intense and severe, but the last couple of waves hit me pretty hard... harder than they had been up to that point, but still not as bad as they used to.

1995: Started Paxil for depression, which resolved. Paxil was subsequently discontinued in 1996.

2001: Reinstated 10mg for AM Anxiety. Gradually built up to 50mg.

2008-2017: Buspar

2012-2017: Ativan

2016-2020: Several failed attempts to get off paxil through guesstimated tapering.

2020/2021: Began "slower" tapering/holding of paxil but the reductions in dosage were still too much at 6.25mg per reduction.

June 2024: Last paxil dose of 6.25mg. Within 3 weeks, began experiencing a multitude of severe physical, mental and emotional symptoms.

Supplements:

Magnesium Glycinate 420mg 4x/day

Fish oil

Cannabis

1

April 3Apr 3

Author

On 4/1/2026 at 9:00 PM, gardengirl2 said:

@Chuey, I honestly don't see yours as a permanent situation. You are not in homeostasis as your body is going between the two extremes. It is working on your behalf. Keep the faith, friend. I'm rootin for you and will be following your progress, eagerly awaiting the day the window doesn't stop. 🙏🌻

Thank you @gardengirl2!

1995: Started Paxil for depression, which resolved. Paxil was subsequently discontinued in 1996.

2001: Reinstated 10mg for AM Anxiety. Gradually built up to 50mg.

2008-2017: Buspar

2012-2017: Ativan

2016-2020: Several failed attempts to get off paxil through guesstimated tapering.

2020/2021: Began "slower" tapering/holding of paxil but the reductions in dosage were still too much at 6.25mg per reduction.

June 2024: Last paxil dose of 6.25mg. Within 3 weeks, began experiencing a multitude of severe physical, mental and emotional symptoms.

Supplements:

Magnesium Glycinate 420mg 4x/day

Fish oil

Cannabis

April 3Apr 3

10 minutes ago, Chuey said:

I appreciate all the encouragement.

Overall I'm way better than I was when it was in the thick of it. The Waves had increasingly become less intense and severe, but the last couple of waves hit me pretty hard... harder than they had been up to that point, but still not as bad as they used to.

Y0u're on the right track! Try not to compare one day to the next. We all have ups and downs. Think about how much better you are compared to 6 or 12 months ago and you'll be able to appreciate the progress you've made and are making.

Started Paxil for GAD in 1999

Unsuccessful taper attempt in 2006

Paxilprogress helped with a successful taper completed in 2009

Using therapy and CBT to manage my anxiety

I offer advice based on my experience. Nothing I share is intended to be medical or therapy advice.

1

April 3Apr 3

18 minutes ago, Chuey said:

The Waves had increasingly become less intense and severe, but the last couple of waves hit me pretty hard... harder than they had been up to that point, but still not as bad as they used to.

It’s great to recognise this @Chuey so common to have some worse periods. Certainly not non linear this journey. But healing is certainly happening here. 😀

I’m not a medical professional and cannot offer medical advice. I only offer my thoughts as support. Please speak to your health practitioner about your care. This is a peer site where we support each other on our taper/recovery journeys.

If you are from the UK please make sure you fill in a 'Yellow Card' report for the MHRA. It is you doing your bit to help make a difference.

Please take the time to do it today 🙂 https://yellowcard.mhra.gov.uk

For US members details here.

1

April 3Apr 3

23 minutes ago, Chuey said:

I appreciate all the encouragement.

Overall I'm way better than I was when it was in the thick of it. The Waves had increasingly become less intense and severe, but the last couple of waves hit me pretty hard... harder than they had been up to that point, but still not as bad as they used to.

It's great that you recognize small improvements, it puts things into perspective and makes the process a little more bearable.

Keep up bravely @Chuey it will get much better.

1998 forced on cipramil *no anxiety/depression background*

Over the years all kinds of SSRI/SNRI/antipsychotics/stabilizers due to apparently side effects/withdrawal

Many attempts to quit over the years with failure (extremely rapid taper followed by doctors' guidens)

Current attempt-Paxil 20 mg:

6/24 20 mg to 5 mg-severe AKA

9/24 Increase to 20-AKA continues

10/24 stopped completely-AKA out of control

11/24 Zoloft bridge attempt-25 mg to 75 mg+Seroquel-AKA continued-stopped them CT.

12/24 Back on Paxil 10mg (0.1789g)-some stabilization-from here tapered by about 30% each time (don't remember doses and dates).

2025 - 7.10 0.0558g (3.11mg)/7.11 3% 0.0541g (3.02mg)/4.12 1% 0.0535g (2.98mg)

2026 - 3.1 1.5% 0.0526g (2.93mg)/9.1 8.5% 0.0480g (2.68mg)/16.2 1.8% 0.0470g (2.62mg)/21.3 1% 0.466 (2.60mg)/23.4 2.2% 0.455g (2.54mg)/8.7 20% 0.0358g (2mg)

Supplements:

Magnesium Glycinate - started 28.5.26 1 capsule 200mg in the morning - Increased brain fog and muscle stiffness - stopped after two weeks.

Iron - liquid, quarter of recommended dose - increased anxiety and burning sensation - stopped after two weeks.

Saffron - started 8.7.26 1 capsule 30mg in the morning - pretty immediate improvement in terms of anxiety and sleep that seems to continue to improve.

1

April 5Apr 5

Author

Enjoying two days of a nice Window. 🙏

Happy Resurrection Day! ✝️

1995: Started Paxil for depression, which resolved. Paxil was subsequently discontinued in 1996.

2001: Reinstated 10mg for AM Anxiety. Gradually built up to 50mg.

2008-2017: Buspar

2012-2017: Ativan

2016-2020: Several failed attempts to get off paxil through guesstimated tapering.

2020/2021: Began "slower" tapering/holding of paxil but the reductions in dosage were still too much at 6.25mg per reduction.

June 2024: Last paxil dose of 6.25mg. Within 3 weeks, began experiencing a multitude of severe physical, mental and emotional symptoms.

Supplements:

Magnesium Glycinate 420mg 4x/day

Fish oil

Cannabis

2

April 6Apr 6

2 hours ago, Chuey said:

Enjoying two days of a nice Window. 🙏

Happy Resurrection Day! ✝️

How lovely to read 👏 🙏 so glad for you!

Edited April 6Apr 6 by Fullhealing

1998 forced on cipramil *no anxiety/depression background*

Over the years all kinds of SSRI/SNRI/antipsychotics/stabilizers due to apparently side effects/withdrawal

Many attempts to quit over the years with failure (extremely rapid taper followed by doctors' guidens)

Current attempt-Paxil 20 mg:

6/24 20 mg to 5 mg-severe AKA

9/24 Increase to 20-AKA continues

10/24 stopped completely-AKA out of control

11/24 Zoloft bridge attempt-25 mg to 75 mg+Seroquel-AKA continued-stopped them CT.

12/24 Back on Paxil 10mg (0.1789g)-some stabilization-from here tapered by about 30% each time (don't remember doses and dates).

2025 - 7.10 0.0558g (3.11mg)/7.11 3% 0.0541g (3.02mg)/4.12 1% 0.0535g (2.98mg)

2026 - 3.1 1.5% 0.0526g (2.93mg)/9.1 8.5% 0.0480g (2.68mg)/16.2 1.8% 0.0470g (2.62mg)/21.3 1% 0.466 (2.60mg)/23.4 2.2% 0.455g (2.54mg)/8.7 20% 0.0358g (2mg)

Supplements:

Magnesium Glycinate - started 28.5.26 1 capsule 200mg in the morning - Increased brain fog and muscle stiffness - stopped after two weeks.

Iron - liquid, quarter of recommended dose - increased anxiety and burning sensation - stopped after two weeks.

Saffron - started 8.7.26 1 capsule 30mg in the morning - pretty immediate improvement in terms of anxiety and sleep that seems to continue to improve.

1

April 15Apr 15

On 3/31/2026 at 1:45 PM, Chuey said:
A little more than a week of a Window... Now back in Hell... Fear of losing my children, horrible mental images and thoughts, depression, anger. I think this is what it will be like from now on. Brief Windows then back to hellish Waves....the Windows are actually cruel... making me think that I'm actually going to get out of this....only to go back into Waves. This has ruined my life.

I know how hard it is to feel like your getting better then slammed backed down again . Get through this way the best you can .

On Paxil since 1995. Seroquel added 2014 after withdrawal crash. History of too-fast tapers/reinstatements.

21 April 2025 taper two drugs at once

Paxil 4% Seroquel 3.5% per month

that ended up being too much and changed to one drug at a time

13 Jul 2025: 4% Paxil cut

29 Jul 2025: 5% Paxil cut

6 Aug 2025: began hold

Oct 2025: changed from liquid to powder and accidentally took 10x Seroquel dose for 2 weeks by mistake

23 Oct 2025: returned to liquid with accidental 4.7% Seroquel cut

Holding both drugs to stablize

Holding at Paxil 8.25 mg / Seroquel 6.5

Paxil taper

22/4 8.23 29/4 8.20 5/5 8.15 13/5 8.05 3/6 8 11/6 7.95

1

April 16Apr 16

Author

I've been feeling pretty "Windowish" the last week or so. Even to the point of ALMOST thinking "Wow, maybe I'm almost out of this mess." I'm not quite there yet, but definitely more hopeful of getting there. 🙏

Today though, has been more challenging with dread, sadness and fear and some DR/DP. What a crazy rollercoaster ride!

1995: Started Paxil for depression, which resolved. Paxil was subsequently discontinued in 1996.

2001: Reinstated 10mg for AM Anxiety. Gradually built up to 50mg.

2008-2017: Buspar

2012-2017: Ativan

2016-2020: Several failed attempts to get off paxil through guesstimated tapering.

2020/2021: Began "slower" tapering/holding of paxil but the reductions in dosage were still too much at 6.25mg per reduction.

June 2024: Last paxil dose of 6.25mg. Within 3 weeks, began experiencing a multitude of severe physical, mental and emotional symptoms.

Supplements:

Magnesium Glycinate 420mg 4x/day

Fish oil

Cannabis

Chuey: Paxil (PaxHell) for 23 years

Featured Replies

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

Chuey

Fullhealing

Chuey

Create an account or sign in to comment

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

Chuey

Fullhealing

Chuey

Account

Navigation

Search

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)

Chrome (Desktop)

Safari (iOS 16.4+)

Safari (macOS)

Edge (Android)

Edge (Desktop)

Firefox (Android)

Firefox (Desktop)