As you can see in my signature Ive been on a long ride starting back in 2022 and then tapering prozac for 19 months.  Ive never ever stabilized on prozac even with multiple holds.  I have liquid prozac and am at 3.12mg.   Felt depression and suicidal ideation once I started prozac in May 2024 (did not have those side effects prior to prozac).  Also, 12 years ago a doctor put me on prozac and 3 days in I was on the floor in my bathroom losing my mind (serious debilitating anxiety and panic like I had never experienced).  I called the doctor back then and they immediately put me on zoloft.  Fast forward, I don't know why I was dumb enough to agree to try prozac again 10-12 year later to taper off of but I feel like Ive been living that crazy panicked day from 12 years ago every single day for 19 months.

 

All that to say, I cannot continue to taper super slowly for another year/2 years.  I am currently dropping .02 mg per day.   What are your thoughts on this?  I am really struggling. 

Hi @Need to End

 

Welcome to the forum!

 

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I'm so sorry to read about the tough time you've had recently you will find plenty of support here for sure.

 

I think you had an ADR to Prozac in 2014 from what I can understand from reading your post above. (Can you add this Prozac event in your footer for me?)

 

The doctor then treated the symptoms of this with Zoloft where you stayed for around 8 years. 

 

You then look to have switched to Lexapro for a couple of years. Was it a CT switch?

 

Then from what Im reading you moved back to Zoloft, again was this a CT switch?

 

Just looking at your footer you CT/switched to Prozac in 2024?

 

You started to taper from Prozac in in May 24? Not sure what your taper schedule was like but it looks like it may have been pretty fast?

 

Each one of these events would have been very destabilising to your nervous system and Im not surprised you are having such a hard time.

 

I think on the basis that you have always reacted badly to Prozac there is little reason to hold other than to try to gain at least some stability which you don't apprear to be able to do. ADRs tend to lessen with the dose but that doesnt seem to be working out for you.

 

This is your choice but I would suggest you taper at 10% of your last dose per month where you can bare it and hope this reaction reduces as you get lower.

You could always try the Brass Monkey slide. This may be more bearable but still have the speed you need.

Like this:

WK1 - 2.5%

WK2 - 2.5%

WK3 - 2.5%

WK4 - 2.5%

WK 5&6 - Hold

Then repeat.

 

I think a lot of what you are suffering with is an injury from all your previous drug episodes that only time will heal. Its clear Prozac isn't helping this process and so being off it sooner rather than later would be my thoughts on this.

 

Im so very sorry for what you are going through it must very hard.

 

In the mean time this is what I would do if I were you:

 

-Stay Hydrated 

 

-Eat a good clean whole food diet, avoiding processed foods and sugars.

 

-Stay away from caffeine, alcohol and antihistamines and any other psychoactive substances.

 

Supplements are to be avoided initially, as they often irritate our nervous systems. Try to get your nutrition through food.

 

Down the line, you may wish to introduce Fish Oil and Magnesium. Those who can tolerate them have found them calming to the nervous system. Be careful try one at a time and start low and see how you get on should you choose to try them.

 

A daily walk is very important as much as you can manage, if you can manage it. Gets you your fresh air and Vitamin D does wonders for your mind!

 

You are very welcome here and I hope you find the site supportive.

 

Chippy

10 hours ago, Need to End said:

I cannot continue to taper super slowly for another year/2 years.  I am currently dropping .02 mg per day.   What are your thoughts on this?  I am really struggling. 

Hi @Need to End We are all so different it's hard to say with any certainty. So sorry to hear the struggles you're dealing with.

 

I can share with you what brought me undone about 10 months ago. I too was eager to get of the medication, in this case Escitalopram. I had tapered down to less than 2mg hyperbolically and then I switched to decreasing 0.006mg every 2 days. I did this for about 3 months and then suddenly my body would not let me drop at all without horrendous panic and anxiety. That's when I joined Surviving Antidepressants.  I had been tapering linearly instead of hyperbolically and a whole host of symptoms had accumulated which needed to surface. I had to hold and it was 3.5 months of hell. I've been micro tapering since then with far fewer symptoms.

 

As I said - we are all different. You could try getting a consultation with someone like Mark Horowitz to advise you. You may have medical reasons for wanting to either stop or accelerate the taper. 

Thank you for the feedback guys it means a lot!  My life has literally been falling apart during this and holding just has not helped.   Ive gone from 3.6 to 3.10 in a month and don't feel any worse really.   Just the same level of terrible.  I need to get to more functional before I lose everything.  Recently went through a divorce and a massive industry / income change so the stress and pressures are through the roof.   

 

The fear is I will never feel better.  I can tell you my physical symptoms are better than they were at a higher dose but the emotional mental stuff is near debilitating.   Its cost me a ton of productivity at work.  Im able to workout 5 x's a week.   Other than that I am in my bed which takes away from my kids and life is just passing me by which is depressing in and of itself. 

9 hours ago, Need to End said:

Thank you for the feedback guys it means a lot!  My life has literally been falling apart during this and holding just has not helped.   Ive gone from 3.6 to 3.10 in a month and don't feel any worse really.   Just the same level of terrible.  I need to get to more functional before I lose everything.  Recently went through a divorce and a massive industry / income change so the stress and pressures are through the roof.   

 

Im so sorry @Need to End All of this stress wont be helping matters. Time is the healer of life problems often the answer start to show up eventually. You have a lot to process here for sure.

 

9 hours ago, Need to End said:

The fear is I will never feel better.  I can tell you my physical symptoms are better than they were at a higher dose but the emotional mental stuff is near debilitating.   Its cost me a ton of productivity at work.  Im able to workout 5 x's a week.   Other than that I am in my bed which takes away from my kids and life is just passing me by which is depressing in and of itself. 

I know that fear. We all share it. It's good you can recognise the improving symptoms as you drop. This is good and evidence in my mind reducing is working for you. I think you have to allow much time for the CNS to heal the rest.

 

How quickly you come off now is up to you.

 

If you feel a hold makes sense then do that. Its better to come off when stable for most but in your case (when you feel ready) I think it is sensible to continue as you have been but no faster than the normal 10% as I said above and get it out of your system so you can get on with the job of healing.

 

Do it at your pace though, I still think looking for some stability is a good idea and you might start to find it now you are at lower doses but we don't know really do we.

 

Just my thoughts.

 

Chippy

 

 

Thank you.   Am I doomed if I go faster than 10%?  At 10% Im still tapering for another 2 years which makes this a 4 year process and I just can't make it another 2 years doing this.   If I go over 10% could it just be that my side effects may be a bit worse for a period of time? 

2 hours ago, Need to End said:

Thank you.   Am I doomed if I go faster than 10%?  At 10% Im still tapering for another 2 years which makes this a 4 year process and I just can't make it another 2 years doing this.   If I go over 10% could it just be that my side effects may be a bit worse for a period of time? 

I understand your sense of urgency @Need to End. As you already know everyone is different and it is difficult to predict. How fast you go is up to you. My suggestion is to watch some Anders Sorensen YouTube videos which cover questions you probably have. I tried to speed things up over a year ago. Because there is a lag time between reducing doses and the emergence of withdrawal symptoms my symptoms accumulated and I ended up crashing necessitating a 3.5 month hold. Since then I’m more in tune with what my body is trying to tell me. I’ve changed my goal from getting off ASAP to remaining stable and functional, letting withdrawal take a back seat.

However, I am not you. You may be able to go faster but no one can say with any certainty how this will work out. I hope this helps a little.

8 hours ago, Need to End said:

Thank you.   Am I doomed if I go faster than 10%?  At 10% Im still tapering for another 2 years which makes this a 4 year process and I just can't make it another 2 years doing this.   If I go over 10% could it just be that my side effects may be a bit worse for a period of time? 

@Catbird has summed it up really. 
 

Tapering down from an ADR is a challenge. You want to get lower/off the drug but you don’t want to cause wd symptoms/kindling that is worse than the ADR. Best advice is the 10% rule but it’s so important to listen to yourself we are all individuals with unique circumstances. 

thank you so much guys.   My challenge is I have not felt stable in 19 months.  Even after holds.   Every day is terror/SI/massive depression etc...  I can't live like that for another 19 months or however long it would take.

 

I have felt like I am not going to make it for several months now and it is only getting more intense as time goes by because there is not any relief.   I guess Im asking if I do this a bit faster (esp since my initial trial with Prozac 14 years ago was a disaster 3 days in) because the medication is making me worse will I have a chance at surviving? 

 

I am beyond scared and feel like my only choice is to not be a part of life any more.   I feel too old to rebuild and have lost so much in the past 2-3 years.   Just hoping that getting off this med might be my saving grace. 

I just joined and read your story...it is just like mine, I am sorry you are going through this...I hope things go ok for you...

8 hours ago, Need to End said:

thank you so much guys.   My challenge is I have not felt stable in 19 months.  Even after holds.   Every day is terror/SI/massive depression etc...  I can't live like that for another 19 months or however long it would take.

It’s our pleasure to be here and at least try to offer some support @Need to End

Im sorry you’ve need gone well with Praxac have you. 
 

8 hours ago, Need to End said:

have felt like I am not going to make it for several months now and it is only getting more intense as time goes by because there is not any relief.   I guess Im asking if I do this a bit faster (esp since my initial trial with Prozac 14 years ago was a disaster 3 days in) because the medication is making me worse will I have a chance at surviving? 

How fast you go is your choice. The advice has always been no more than 10% of your last dose. This is your avoid stacking wd symptoms on top of existing symptoms.

 

8 hours ago, Need to End said:

am beyond scared and feel like my only choice is to not be a part of life any more.   I feel too old to rebuild and have lost so much in the past 2-3 years.   Just hoping that getting off this med might be my saving grace. 

Hang in there! Our bodies are amazing at healing and once you do get off and you will you can focus on getting over this awful experience. 
 

Chippy

@Need to End throughout your taper down to now, have you had any issues with dose drops at all?

Recently from 3.6 to 2.9 in about 40 days I haven't noticed anything really.  Just the same depression, fear, panic, anxiety etc... 

 

From 20mg in the beginning Ive noticed physical symptoms have eased - no more tremors, vomiting less frequently (sometimes vomiting still happens).  

 

I think overall things have gotten better except I notice that I have consistently had crying spells basically all the time.  

Also guys I am so afraid that this level of depression and fear is all my life circumstances and not the meds.  Before the crash and then taper I was never like this but IDK anymore.  I have zero hope and every day it feels like I should just stop because nothing good is ahead for me.   

Is that normal to feel during this?   

7 hours ago, Need to End said:

Also guys I am so afraid that this level of depression and fear is all my life circumstances and not the meds.  Before the crash and then taper I was never like this but IDK anymore.  I have zero hope and every day it feels like I should just stop because nothing good is ahead for me.   

Is that normal to feel during this?   

Dear @Need to End this is your brain doing what it does — telling you a story with no substance. It’s not true. Withdrawal is a hard slog and it’s only human to feel down. I have these thoughts especially when my mood is low.

The thing about the brain is it believes what you tell it. If you tell it everything is hopeless it will crash your mood. When this happens to me I tell myself I know this is temporary, I know this is uncomfortable and I know this will pass. Self talk with compassion, understanding, acceptance and encouragement can help ease your pain and despondency.

Importantly ensure you get good sleep.

I’m so sorry you’re struggling and strongly relate to what you’re going through. This will pass like other symptoms. Don’t let untrue thoughts drag you down. The emotions are real and this is where acceptance, self compassion and reassurance come in.

Reach out to others when you find yourself struggling like this. You’re not alone 🧡🤗

Thank you for your encouraging words.   These forums are all I have so I appreciate the support more than you know.   

 

I get caught up wondering if I was like this before the crash and just happen not to remember so then it feels like I am just returning to a scary state that existed before the crash.  But then the success I have had in life prior to this and the things I did before point to there being no way i felt this horrible before the crash so its very confusing and scary. 

 

I get scared that my recent divorce and financial loss and being in a big house alone on top of the withdrawal are just too much to handle.  Im trying to figure it out but it just feels neverending and I don't have the same grit i had before.   Not to mention i just had a relationship end with a girlfriend that i truly loved and met after my divorce.  Feels like life has dealt me a hand that is not survivable and I want to find a way to survive. 

42 minutes ago, Need to End said:

Also guys I am so afraid that this level of depression and fear is all my life circumstances and not the meds.  Before the crash and then taper I was never like this but IDK anymore.  I have zero hope and every day it feels like I should just stop because nothing good is ahead for me.   

Is that normal to feel during this?   

@Need to End So very common, one of the ugliest part of withdrawal. I struggle with this all the time and honestly I don't think there is anyone here who doesn't. just remember that your system is out of balance and creating false thoughts, It will seize upon anything external and make it the cause, I know, it feels real but we are here to remind you that it's NOT, it's withdrawal mindset.

It is temporary, our system is slowly finding its way towards recovery, it will end eventually, just hang in there. Hugs!

Edited March 2Mar 2 by Fullhealing

Thank you @Fullhealing.  Im at 2.9 mg and dropping .02 per day for the last 45 days or so.   The scary part is not running out of time and money before things get better.   I used to be so in charge of my life and my business and now i can barely get 3 hours work in a day.   I had rental properties and cars and plenty of money but after a divorce, market crash and this I have lost so much that i feel like its all going to run out.  It would be one thing if i was 30 but I am 46 almost 47.  Im scared to death that Ill feel like this for years which i don't think i would survive.  

 

Hopeful that getting to 0 will help me start to recover.   This drug has never been good for my body. 

34 minutes ago, Need to End said:

Thank you for your encouraging words.   These forums are all I have so I appreciate the support more than you know.   

 

I get caught up wondering if I was like this before the crash and just happen not to remember so then it feels like I am just returning to a scary state that existed before the crash.  But then the success I have had in life prior to this and the things I did before point to there being no way i felt this horrible before the crash so its very confusing and scary. 

 

I get scared that my recent divorce and financial loss and being in a big house alone on top of the withdrawal are just too much to handle.  Im trying to figure it out but it just feels neverending and I don't have the same grit i had before.   Not to mention i just had a relationship end with a girlfriend that i truly loved and met after my divorce.  Feels like life has dealt me a hand that is not survivable and I want to find a way to survive. 

I am going thought the same thing...i totally understand 

29 minutes ago, Need to End said:

Thank you @Fullhealing.  Im at 2.9 mg and dropping .02 per day for the last 45 days or so.   The scary part is not running out of time and money before things get better.   I used to be so in charge of my life and my business and now i can barely get 3 hours work in a day.   I had rental properties and cars and plenty of money but after a divorce, market crash and this I have lost so much that i feel like its all going to run out.  It would be one thing if i was 30 but I am 46 almost 47.  Im scared to death that Ill feel like this for years which i don't think i would survive.  

 

Hopeful that getting to 0 will help me start to recover.   This drug has never been good for my body. 

@Need to End I haven't gone through your thread yet so sorry if I missed details, I'm wondering if it's an option to hold for a while and wait for improvement? the low doses are often brutal and adding environmental stresses could be just too overwhelming.

Edited March 2Mar 2 by Fullhealing

8 hours ago, Need to End said:

Recently from 3.6 to 2.9 in about 40 days I haven't noticed anything really.  Just the same depression, fear, panic, anxiety etc... 

 

From 20mg in the beginning Ive noticed physical symptoms have eased - no more tremors, vomiting less frequently (sometimes vomiting still happens).  

 

I think overall things have gotten better except I notice that I have consistently had crying spells basically all the time.  

This is looks to me the reductions are working and proving the ADR. 

 

Just have to keep taking it careful to minimise WD symptoms. If you see them increase hold for a bit and see it that settles them down. I’d still stick to 10% of your last dose if it were me. 

Thank you everyone.  I will keep going at .02mg / day.   I get a compounded formula made that is 1 mg/ml.   

 

Part of my fears are around the SI and depression.  Have others here experienced SI once getting onto prozac (or anothe SSRI) when they never ever ever had SI their entire life prior to? 

 

Same with depression - anyone notice the depression escalate dramatically along with crying spells that leave you with red bumps under your eyes/tear ducts the next day constantly? 

 

Im asking because Im am SO afraid this is who I am and it won't change.

1 hour ago, Need to End said:

Thank you everyone.  I will keep going at .02mg / day.   I get a compounded formula made that is 1 mg/ml.   

 

Part of my fears are around the SI and depression.  Have others here experienced SI once getting onto prozac (or anothe SSRI) when they never ever ever had SI their entire life prior to? 

 

Same with depression - anyone notice the depression escalate dramatically along with crying spells that leave you with red bumps under your eyes/tear ducts the next day constantly? 

 

Im asking because Im am SO afraid this is who I am and it won't change.

@Need to End not sure what SI stands for but definitely depression, very common, for me it actually started while on the drug and still comes in brutal waves along with other symptoms I never knew before.

truly sorry you're in a hot spot but do your best not to believe this mindset and distract yourself if possible, it's all an expression of a dysregulated CNS.

Hope staying on your current dosage will help you stabilize soon enough, hang in there 🙏

Edited March 3Mar 3 by Fullhealing

Thank you @Fullhealing.    SI stands for suicidal ideation.   Unfortunately holding has never helped me stabilize I think my body has a paradoxical reaction to prozac so for me the best bet is to get off the drug.   Every day is hell 😞 and has been since getting on it. 

4 minutes ago, Need to End said:

Thank you @Fullhealing.    SI stands for suicidal ideation.   Unfortunately holding has never helped me stabilize I think my body has a paradoxical reaction to prozac so for me the best bet is to get off the drug.   Every day is hell 😞 and has been since getting on it. 

@Need to End perhaps now that your body contains less of the drug there's a chance for your system to adjust? so tricky, I wish I could be more helpful, truly sorry.

tagging @Chippy for his thoughts on that.