Thank you I don’t feel okay. Thank you for caring and replying you guys are the best. This daily fear and panic and the crying and sobbing is painful and scary. I never cried like this . I am down to 2.08mg.

I’m responding to your question about tapering here so others can share their experiences. First, things back in 2006-09 then weren’t as precise as they are now. I just used a pill cutter to eyeball the reduction. I stuck to a monthly reduction schedule despite any side effects. I figured the best way to get past the side effects was to get the taper over with. I’m not sure I’d do that again. Also, there were several months when I felt everyone besides me was making progress, and I was stuck. Later I realized that it was my anxiety blinding me to the progress I was making and trying to maintain its grip. Like everyone else, I had good days and some awful days. Also, there was never a day I woke up and told myself “I’m cured”! It was a slow and gradual process till I realized I wasn’t reacting as anxiously to triggers as I was before. Trust me, if I could recover, you can too!

Ty sooooo much. @mstimc60 so you did more of a linear taper?

I feel like what you did is what have to do since holds haven’t helped. And what you said about progress is exactly how I feel.

How old were you when you were tapering?

Did you start feeling better less anxious etc… as you tapered or not until after you were off?

7 minutes ago, Need to End said:

Ty sooooo much. @mstimc60 so you did more of a linear taper?

I feel like what you did is what have to do since holds haven’t helped. And what you said about progress is exactly how I feel.

How old were you when you were tapering?

Did you start feeling better less anxious etc… as you tapered or not until after you were off?

I was 45 and had been on Paxil for seven years.

I’d say the worse time for side effects and WD symptoms was 12 to 24 months into the taper. The last year was a bit easier. Also, as I mentioned in another member’s thread, there was a spike as I neared the end of my taper. I think that was due to the anticipatory anxiety of not knowing what my life would be like without the drug. The entire process from beginning my taper to feeling “recovered “ took about three years.

@mstimc60 ty!! Did you do more of a linear taper?

Edited May 7May 7 by Need to End

Yup. Can’t remember if it was 5% or 10%. I want to say it was 10%, with the amounts decreasing since they were 10% of a smaller number.

@mstimc60 . Ok sounds like a hyperbolic taper rather than linear. 10% of most recent dose?

I’m at 2.08mg after 2 years and if I do that 10% of last dose I’ll be doing this for 2-3 more years and I can’t put up with the symptoms much longer.

Am I screwed if I don’t do hyperbolic from her on out?

Holds and going slow have not helped me

I’ll let our experts on tapering respond to your question. I will say you can make things easier on yourself if you start practicing some coping methods and try to manage your ruminations. That’s what got me through it.

3 hours ago, Need to End said:

Guys I’m sorry I just really don’t feel like being here today and that I’ll not be happy again. This is so freaking scary it isn’t letting up

Hey N2E. I’m very sorry to read. This can be such a challenging journey. You are doing really well. Remember this when things are tough. You’ll look back in years to come and be very proud of how strong you have been through this. Hang in there.

Ty so much.

@mstimc60 sonit took you 3 yrs to taper?

Do you happen to recall when the sobbing and the SI stopped during or after the taper and or during the tower do you recall at what point?

One of my biggest fears is becoming less functional as I get toward zero and I’m already struggling a lot.

It took me three years to taper and reach what I define as recovery. It’s not necessarily sequential. You don’t taper then recover. You need to work on recovery as you’re tapering. That minimizes the effects of WD.

I didn’t have a lot of crying when I was in withdrawal. My biggest problems were severe health anxiety and a constant feeling of dread. These dissipated very slowly as I tapered and practiced coping methods.

I keep coming back to it, but the biggest favor you can do for yourself is to start practicing coping methods now. They’ll help you deal with the effects of withdrawal and prepare you for a life without meds.

@mstimc60 ok Ty. So how long did ot take you to get to 0 mg? The full 3 years or ?

And I will work on it. It’s hard to even pick myself up off the floor at this stage mentally and emotionally. For ex vomiting has returned after anything stresses my nervous system out in the early part of the day. I’m excessively tired and the fear is debilitating. It’s not like it’s just something that’s making life a little challenging it’s flipped my life upside down mentally emotionally and physically

As I recall, it took me a little less than three years to get to zero and the full three years to reach recovery.

5 minutes ago, Need to End said:

It’s hard to even pick myself up off the floor at this stage mentally and emotionally. For ex vomiting has returned after anything stresses my nervous system out in the early part of the day. I’m excessively tired and the fear is debilitating. It’s not like it’s just something that’s making life a little challenging it’s flipped my life upside down mentally emotionally and physically

I understand. But your suffering isn't unusual. I'd list all of my symptoms during WD but it would probably trigger you, so I'll leave it saying many people, including me, experienced profound suffering before seeing any improvement. You need to shift your focus from your symptoms and limitations to working on recovery. Your anxious mind wants you to fixate on all your problems--that's how it maintains control. Here are some links to help your build a coping toolbox:

Ty @mstimc60 i hope im not bugging you. This is extremely helpful. I need to survive and also continue to provide financially and it’s very scary right now.

I get it. I had to keep working because the insurance from my job covered my family. Working actually helped because it made me focus on something other than myself.

@mstimc60 what if it’s hard to work more than a few hrs a day. Does that mean I’m in worse shape than you were or most people?

7 minutes ago, Need to End said:

@mstimc60 what if it’s hard to work more than a few hrs a day. Does that mean I’m in worse shape than you were or most people?

A few hours is very good! Many people can’t work at all and some can’t even leave their homes. Do what you can—that’s enough for now. And do not compare yourself with others. That’s a rabbit hole you don’t want to go down, believe me. Work on your own recovery in your own way and things will go a lot better. Your anxious mind wants to convince you that you’re worse than everyone else and that’s simply not true.

@mstimc60 okay Ty for that. Everywhere I go I see people smiling, listening to music, running errands living life and mine is quite literally falling apart. I’ll do my best

2 hours ago, Need to End said:

@mstimc60 okay Ty for that. Everywhere I go I see people smiling, listening to music, running errands living life and mine is quite literally falling apart. I’ll do my best

you're doing your best, we know, you have a strong fighting spirit @Need to End it just takes longer than we want.

I struggle to see the world alive, happy and progressing as well, natural for anyone who is in suffering but we keep on pushing forward, we'll get there.

Edited May 8May 8 by Fullhealing

@Need to End and @mstimc60 I came across this reel this morning. It may help Stressing out won’t help

Ty for this and ty for caring enough to even share. I will try. I honestly don’t know how to do this tbh. Like when I feel massive fear and anxiety mentally and physically or I vomit I don’t know how to not stress about it but I would love tj not

Here are some links from the Coping Strategies forum you may want to review. I also suggest you do a search for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy on the Internet. CBT has a lot of different techniques to help with ruminations and recurring fear.

Ok I have a therapist and he is focusing on erp therapy rn. I don’t want to get too many things going - does erp help?

Yes. I practiced ERP and it really helped me.

If you have a therapist, follow his guidance on coping strategies.

Edited May 9May 9 by mstimc60