20 hours ago, Nemina said:

I am having more and more problems with my thumping and jumping heart. I hear it in my ears, I feel it in the chest and under my ears along the throat, what an unnerving symptom. Heart jumps like a bat in a cage, desperately trying to escape. Keeps me from sleeping, gives a bodily feeling of anxiety, makes me wired and tired. We will see, what the doctor says today. I want just the blood testing, If I have an ECG, he might come up with some strange diagnosis, when it’s definitely just withdrawal. I just need to get through this period.

I am sorry to hear, good you are gettig checked, I suspect you are right and just WD, better safe than sorry.

20 hours ago, Nemina said:

Today I took a quarter of a tablet of metoprolol, but so far I haven’t noticed any improvement.

I would give the beta blockers a mis personally, they can cause problems from what I have seen.

Assuming you check out ok, I suspect this is a case of riding the wave out. I would definitely hold, keep the stress as low as you can and take it one day at a time. What a journey Nemina! xxxx

Thanks to you, friends, I know that I’m not alone and that out there, there are people who understand. You are such a blessing, all of you.

Yes, @Chippy and @Catbird , I will definitely hold for a while.

So far holding has not helped me during my journey , though, but maybe I’ve never been patient enough to break through. I am worried that I am triggering my system with every time that I am taking the drug. I still have 8% receptor occupancy. I want to get rid of this!

So far it seems to me that May , month 20, I think , has been my best month , June was better, too, and in July and August (so far)I have had a lot of problems with new symptoms and old alarm and anxiety. My back pain is better and I have more energy than in the first year and usually I have a little window every evening, that is positive. But I also have a lot of sadness, heart palpitations, anxiety, sometimes nausea and sleep issues. Yesterday I had a migraine attack in the evening and as always when I took the Triptan I felt wonderfully tired and had a good sleep. Even enjoying a migraine these days! 🤪😅

I’m sending out a hug to all of you, who are journeying with me. ❤️ we are all in this together.

Edited August 21Aug 21 by Nemina

Hi @Nemina can you describe your palpitations? Do they start suddenly, are they associated with bending over, are they part of a panic attack? Do you have irregular beats? How fast is it? Can you do anything to stop them like the valsalva manoeuvre or holding your breath? I can understand the prescription of beta blockers in this context. If you’re seeing your doctor soon it would be useful to be able to describe the pattern along side your dose tapering. There may be a link.

I had SVT when I was tapering too fast. I had >120 episodes in a year. It was only when I had to hold my dose the episodes miraculously disappeared. I was booked in for a cardiac ablation which I kept postponing because I had very few episodes and I’m no longer concerned about it. I finally cancelled it at the end of last year. I’ve had one ot two episodes since but I can stop them by holding my breath.

35 minutes ago, Nemina said:

month 20, I think , has been my best month , June was better, too, and in July and August (so far)I have had a lot of problems with new symptoms and old alarm and anxiety.

Interesting that I am at month 21 and currently experiencing new and old symptoms too. So far, months 1 to 6 terrible, month10 bad, and month 21 same old with new symptoms but not intense as so far....

6 hours ago, Nemina said:

Thanks to you, friends, I know that I’m not alone and that out there, there are people who understand. You are such a blessing, all of you.

Yes, @Chippy and @Catbird , I will definitely hold for a while.

So far holding has not helped me during my journey , though, but maybe I’ve never been patient enough to break through. I am worried that I am triggering my system with every time that I am taking the drug. I still have 8% receptor occupancy. I want to get rid of this!

So far it seems to me that May , month 20, I think , has been my best month , June was better, too, and in July and August (so far)I have had a lot of problems with new symptoms and old alarm and anxiety. My back pain is better and I have more energy than in the first year and usually I have a little window every evening, that is positive. But I also have a lot of sadness, heart palpitations, anxiety, sometimes nausea and sleep issues. Yesterday I had a migraine attack in the evening and as always when I took the Triptan I felt wonderfully tired and had a good sleep. Even enjoying a migraine these days! 🤪😅

I’m sending out a hug to all of you, who are journeying with me. ❤️ we are all in this together.

Hi @Nemina I'm sorry that the last few months have not been particularly kind, even though we are experienced and know well enough that this is a curvy road it doesn't make it any easier.

I, like you, feel like holding didn't do me any favor but it's more likely that impatience that is already ingrained quite strong in my core led me to be hasty..

This process, for the most part, is going to be much longer than we expect, I'm doing my best to work on acceptance and give the system a long time to recover in between, huge challenge.

Slowly my friend with enough time I am sure your system will feel much better just keep being strong and coping so well!

Still a long way to go but we'll reach the end point much more resilient than we expected. all of us.

Hugs and love to you xxx

Edited August 22Aug 22 by Fullhealing

10 hours ago, Nemina said:

I’m sending out a hug to all of you, who are journeying with me. ❤️ we are all in this together.

Hugs back dear @Nemina we are all in this together for sure xxx

Thanks @Catbird , @Raymond , @Fullhealing and @Chippy ! It is so lovely that I do not send my messages into an empty space but get heard and even answered by lovely people like you.

@Catbird :

Hi @Nemina can you describe your palpitations? Do they start suddenly, are they associated with bending over, are they part of a panic attack? Do you have irregular beats? How fast is it? Can you do anything to stop them like the valsalva manoeuvre or holding your breath? I can understand the prescription of beta blockers in this context. If you’re seeing your doctor soon it would be useful to be able to describe the pattern along side your dose tapering. There may be a link.

First of all, I can hear and feel my heartbeat. It is really strong and loud. And secondly, every 5 to 20 beats it has like two beats very fast after one another and then a longer pause. Like stumbling. It feels like fear and alarm even though I can locate it in my body and not in circumstances. So it is not real fear, and I keep telling myself this. I have not tried to stop this, but it sounds like a great idea. I will look into that. The doctor made this heart monitoring, but only about four beats long and there was not one of these stumbling beats right in this moment, so he couldn’t say much about it. I am still waiting for the results of the blood test.

@Raymond , yes, we are again on a similar trajectory I think. I am in month 21 and so far it’s not been a good one. Deep Sadness and anxiety, alarm, and negative thinking at the moment my main symptoms. Usually, I have a window in the evening though, which is great. ( Not tonight, but I had a better hour during the afternoon….)

On 8/22/2026 at 6:46 AM, Fullhealing said:

This process, for the most part, is going to be much longer than we expect, I'm doing my best to work on acceptance and give the system a long time to recover in between, huge challenge.

Yes, my dear, same challenge for me. Acceptance is hard when you have felt better for a while and also because healing takes such a terrible long time. But I’m willing to accept what is, and actually I think “challenge” is a good word. Let’s try to see it as one and let’s master it!

We are all together in this, as @Chippy so rightly says. Thank you for being here for all of us, dear @Chippy .

Big hug to all of you!

Edited August 24Aug 24 by Nemina

You are in my thoughts @Nemina I hope you're bit better, hugs xxx

Edited August 29Aug 29 by Fullhealing

Hello everyone, I do not know what to make of all this. I am really struggling with acceptance. May and June i’ve been better and on the whole, I felt on a good trajectory, looking back on the whole 20 months journey so far. But July and August have been quite hard. I was so hoping for the summer to be a better time!

My expectations were too high. I am having ( besides the sadness, nausea, heart palpitations, anxiety, tinnitus , fatigue, weakness, and joint pain) anxiety attacks, feeling really fearful, hiding at home and trying to ride it out. yesterday I had two of those attacks and of course I felt terrible in between. Made the mistake to dose off at noon, which ended really toxic. Same in the evening when I tried to sleep. I went a little earlier as usual, because I was so worn down, but it turned out a bad idea.

A negative development for two long months, this is really hard on me. I have been reducing only with tiny daily steps in the last months and was hoping that this will be good, but somehow it wasn’t. Now I’ve been holding for the last two weeks or so and I plan to keep holding until things settle down.

I do have windows, albeit dirty ones, almost every day. I even had a full day window last week. But the waves, as short as they are, are strong and rough, like in acute and often they last most of the day.

End of September, I will fulfill two years of tapering, and I am not in a good place so far. I am trying to accept and have set myself next summer as my goal for feeling better. Autumn and winter is normally difficult for me because of Hashimoto, even without withdrawal. So I do not expect much for the next months. acceptance, this is the only thing I can work on at the moment.

Please excuse the rant… but who will understand me if not, you guys? Thank you for being here with me! ❤️

2 hours ago, Nemina said:

My expectations were too high. I am having ( besides the sadness, nausea, heart palpitations, anxiety, tinnitus , fatigue, weakness, and joint pain) anxiety attacks, feeling really fearful, hiding at home and trying to ride it out. yesterday I had two of those attacks and of course I felt terrible in between. Made the mistake to dose off at noon, which ended really toxic. Same in the evening when I tried to sleep. I went a little earlier as usual, because I was so worn down, but it turned out a bad idea.

A negative development for two long months, this is really hard on me. I have been reducing only with tiny daily steps in the last months and was hoping that this will be good, but somehow it wasn’t. Now I’ve been holding for the last two weeks or so and I plan to keep holding until things settle down.

I do have windows, albeit dirty ones, almost every day. I even had a full day window last week. But the waves, as short as they are, are strong and rough, like in acute and often they last most of the day.

I'm sorry you've found yourself in a tough wave @Nemina. It's frustrating how unpredictable this whole process can be. If only someone could tell us "if you taper this way you'll be absolutely fine"! But you've made good progress on your taper and I think with a good hold things will calm down again. The dirty windows are a good sign 😊

2 hours ago, Nemina said:

End of September, I will fulfill two years of tapering, and I am not in a good place so far. I am trying to accept and have set myself next summer as my goal for feeling better. Autumn and winter is normally difficult for me because of Hashimoto, even without withdrawal. So I do not expect much for the next months. acceptance, this is the only thing I can work on at the moment.

Acceptance is key, just taking things one day at a time without expectation. I know this is hard and I still have to work on it myself every day. But little by little, sometimes walking, sometimes crawling, we will all get there 💜.

4 hours ago, Nemina said:

Hello everyone, I do not know what to make of all this. I am really struggling with acceptance. May and June i’ve been better and on the whole, I felt on a good trajectory, looking back on the whole 20 months journey so far. But July and August have been quite hard. I was so hoping for the summer to be a better time!

My expectations were too high. I am having ( besides the sadness, nausea, heart palpitations, anxiety, tinnitus , fatigue, weakness, and joint pain) anxiety attacks, feeling really fearful, hiding at home and trying to ride it out. yesterday I had two of those attacks and of course I felt terrible in between. Made the mistake to dose off at noon, which ended really toxic. Same in the evening when I tried to sleep. I went a little earlier as usual, because I was so worn down, but it turned out a bad idea.

A negative development for two long months, this is really hard on me. I have been reducing only with tiny daily steps in the last months and was hoping that this will be good, but somehow it wasn’t. Now I’ve been holding for the last two weeks or so and I plan to keep holding until things settle down.

I do have windows, albeit dirty ones, almost every day. I even had a full day window last week. But the waves, as short as they are, are strong and rough, like in acute and often they last most of the day.

End of September, I will fulfill two years of tapering, and I am not in a good place so far. I am trying to accept and have set myself next summer as my goal for feeling better. Autumn and winter is normally difficult for me because of Hashimoto, even without withdrawal. So I do not expect much for the next months. acceptance, this is the only thing I can work on at the moment.

Please excuse the rant… but who will understand me if not, you guys? Thank you for being here with me! ❤️

Words fail me today dear @Nemina yet I wanted you to know my heart is with you. You possess a rare strength and courage and this too shall pass.

Sending a vast, comforting embrace 🤍

19 hours ago, Nemina said:

Hello everyone, I do not know what to make of all this. I am really struggling with acceptance. May and June i’ve been better and on the whole, I felt on a good trajectory, looking back on the whole 20 months journey so far. But July and August have been quite hard. I was so hoping for the summer to be a better time!

My expectations were too high. I am having ( besides the sadness, nausea, heart palpitations, anxiety, tinnitus , fatigue, weakness, and joint pain) anxiety attacks, feeling really fearful, hiding at home and trying to ride it out. yesterday I had two of those attacks and of course I felt terrible in between. Made the mistake to dose off at noon, which ended really toxic. Same in the evening when I tried to sleep. I went a little earlier as usual, because I was so worn down, but it turned out a bad idea.

A negative development for two long months, this is really hard on me. I have been reducing only with tiny daily steps in the last months and was hoping that this will be good, but somehow it wasn’t. Now I’ve been holding for the last two weeks or so and I plan to keep holding until things settle down.

I do have windows, albeit dirty ones, almost every day. I even had a full day window last week. But the waves, as short as they are, are strong and rough, like in acute and often they last most of the day.

End of September, I will fulfill two years of tapering, and I am not in a good place so far. I am trying to accept and have set myself next summer as my goal for feeling better. Autumn and winter is normally difficult for me because of Hashimoto, even without withdrawal. So I do not expect much for the next months. acceptance, this is the only thing I can work on at the moment.

Please excuse the rant… but who will understand me if not, you guys? Thank you for being here with me! ❤️

Hey @Nemina I am so very sorry to read. I am however very much lifted to hear things were better for you a couple of months ago, and that you get windows. I think sitting sight sounds like a good idea, those little drops catching up with you no doubt. Perhaps it's worth putting the August one back to help a little? If you felt wavy in July Aug, dropping more even just a little probably wasn't the move to make,

Hang in there my friend. We all know how cruel WD can be, the ups and downs, the sharp turns can be very unsettling. You are of course right acceptance is everything in this, and tbh life in general.

Better days a coming xxxx

@Nemina I just wanted to pop in to say I think you're doing an amazing job coming this far on your table. I'm sorry you're struggling at the moment but congrats getting so low.

23 hours ago, Nemina said:

Hello everyone, I do not know what to make of all this. I am really struggling with acceptance. May and June i’ve been better and on the whole, I felt on a good trajectory, looking back on the whole 20 months journey so far. But July and August have been quite hard. I was so hoping for the summer to be a better time!

My expectations were too high. I am having ( besides the sadness, nausea, heart palpitations, anxiety, tinnitus , fatigue, weakness, and joint pain) anxiety attacks, feeling really fearful, hiding at home and trying to ride it out. yesterday I had two of those attacks and of course I felt terrible in between. Made the mistake to dose off at noon, which ended really toxic. Same in the evening when I tried to sleep. I went a little earlier as usual, because I was so worn down, but it turned out a bad idea.

A negative development for two long months, this is really hard on me. I have been reducing only with tiny daily steps in the last months and was hoping that this will be good, but somehow it wasn’t. Now I’ve been holding for the last two weeks or so and I plan to keep holding until things settle down.

I do have windows, albeit dirty ones, almost every day. I even had a full day window last week. But the waves, as short as they are, are strong and rough, like in acute and often they last most of the day.

End of September, I will fulfill two years of tapering, and I am not in a good place so far. I am trying to accept and have set myself next summer as my goal for feeling better. Autumn and winter is normally difficult for me because of Hashimoto, even without withdrawal. So I do not expect much for the next months. acceptance, this is the only thing I can work on at the moment.

Please excuse the rant… but who will understand me if not, you guys? Thank you for being here with me! ❤️

We certainly understand @Nemina .

You are really are doing so well with your 2 year taper. It seems our hopes and expectations on this journey can be thrown off course so quickly giving us little time to process and accept. Acceptance doesn't come easily.

You will stabilise and come out the other side, you have great commitment and strength. I can understand your disappointment about the summer months being less stable than you had hoped. Autumn and winter are daunting for sure.

As Chippy always says, time is our friend.

Praying you have some good windows soon dear @Nemina. Your body would be doing some good healing despite how you feel. Still

learning that one myself.

Sending you big hugs always xxxxx

Dear @SarahMc @Chippy @Tracey @Fullhealing and @cheeky ! So kind of you to be here and encourage me!❤️ thank you for all your love and your valuable wisdom. I keep working on acceptance and I have to say, today I have a better day. It is so great to know that this lovely community is here on the good days and on the bad days. I know how you guys are suffering, thanks so much for taking the time and strength to write on my thread! It means a lot to me.

I just read a post by @The_Taper_Man and want to pick up on his wonderful idea to develop something beautiful to look forward to, a dream one will fulfill once this terrible withdrawal time is over, a “North Star” , that one is heading towards. I have not decided yet, but it’s a great thing to even think about. Maybe I want to learn scuba diving, or make a trip to New Zealand in the winter, when it’s summer there, or I’ll take my whole family, including grown-up sons and their partners to a vacation on a Greek island…. it is a great thing to muse about positive future possibilities. Who wants to join in?

I have lost my 'north star' dear @Nemina. Desperately want it back and some hope. Xx

You sound good in this last post. 🩷

I hope you are doing relatively well dear @Nemina I’m only dropping by the site in small doses as I’m still struggling a lot and feeling overwhelmed but really wanted to thank you for your care and kind words on my thread.

Sending you so much love and a hug ❤️

@Nemina Dropping by to see how you’re doing. Hopefully you’re hanging in there.

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

On 9/4/2026 at 6:38 AM, Tracey said:

I have lost my 'north star' dear @Nemina. Desperately want it back and some hope. Xx

You sound good in this last post. 🩷

I know, dear @Tracey , you are in such a terrible long, lasting wave combined with all these disruptions in your life. I pray and believe that you will find new Hope. I had some stresses this last week with a very difficult family member and I was incredibly shaken by the conflict that I would normally probably handle more easily. I actually have been thinking of you in the middle of this,how hard it is to cope with psychological or relational stress in withdrawal. Have a big hug my brave friend.

On 9/11/2026 at 8:34 PM, Fullhealing said:

I hope you are doing relatively well dear @Nemina I’m only dropping by the site in small doses as I’m still struggling a lot and feeling overwhelmed but really wanted to thank you for your care and kind words on my thread.

Sending you so much love and a hug

Thank you so much for for dropping by my friend! I really appreciate it. I so hope that things will settle down for you soon,@Fullhealing , but I know that you are such a strong warrior you will make it through however, long it takes. 💙✨

Dear @Lighty and dear @Wildflower , thank you so much for thinking of me and writing on my thread! It is so valuable for me that I’m not alone in this and that there are lovely people on this forum who think of me. 💗

I will try to give a little update. May and June have been better months. This has made me very hopeful. But July and August (months 22 and 23)have been very difficult. Many waves, a lot of sadness, nausea, heart palpitations, anxiety, tinnitus , fatigue, weakness, joint pain, anxiety…

September so far has been better. I had more window days. One day I felt even relaxed, I was very tired, but in a good way, I did at least two naps during the day and they did not end up toxic, just being relaxed, it was beautiful. I realized how not relaxed I usually am, even in a window. But on this one day it was possible for my body and my brain to let the tension go, and this was wonderful.

But the waves are still strong sometimes. Today I had a really bad day with lots of sadness, intrusive thoughts, feeling nervous and anxious. The anxiousness is like hot waves rolling through my stomach. A disgusting feeling. But I was able to do a workout. Even though it did not help with the symptoms, I am still thankful that I was able to do it. The heart palpitations also are much weaker. I can usually feel them only when I lay on my left side in bed.

I had some extremely rough days when a family member of mine was lashing out against me for no reason. She did this twice. Afterwards, she always said she was sorry and that it was because she feels under stress and that I have not deserved this, but I realized in all that I have no resources to cope with this kind of extreme stress. It put me in full alarm mode for 24 hours twice. So I really feel for all of you who have to go through difficult life transitions of family conflicts…

I have been holding for about a month now. I do not know whether this really makes a difference so far, but I will keep holding. In October my son will marry and will have a big wedding. The couple will stay with us in our house during and after that, they are moving to our city and they do not have a place to live yet. Nor do they have jobs. So I do not know how long they will live with us. I am very pleased and happy and thankful that my son wants to move back to his hometown after a couple of years on another continent. And my daughter-in-law is a lovely woman whom I like very much. But of course this transition will be stressful for all of us. our house is very small and I want to be as fit as possible for the challenge, so I will keep holding as long as the outer situation demands and hope and pray that I will be stable and that everybody will feel well around me.

As always, I want to stress how thankful I am for all of you, my companions on this incredible and hard journey! This forum is a wonderful place and every single one of you is an important part of it. Thanks for going with me. Together, we will heal. And I strongly believe that we are learning and growing on this journey. God bless all of you.

44 minutes ago, Nemina said:

Dear @Lighty and dear @Wildflower , thank you so much for thinking of me and writing on my thread! It is so valuable for me that I’m not alone in this and that there are lovely people on this forum who think of me. 💗

no worries, I am planning at least now on making this my purpose, even if i get fully healed and off the drug, I will fight with other people and believe in them.

It's easy to say an event is objectively bad, if it teaches you the meaning on life and gives you a purpose, that i feel like it had for me, then there is value in the pain and suffering, you make the meaning of things and whether they are good or bad, even if objectively it is a bad thing, i might have needed to be here today either way.

Edited September 20Sep 20 by Lighty

Hi Nemina :), I was reading your thread. So I just want to chime in and say hello and reply to your latest post. That sounds like an exhausting experience with your family member. Being on the receiving end of someone’s sudden lashing out—especially when you don’t understand why it is happening—can leave your nervous system in a prolonged state of alarm, even when the person later apologizes. I had a similar experience with a close family member. She did not apologize and she did not talk about it at all. Being in WD this really put me into a freeze mode like state for more than two weeks after that attack-like-behavior. WD can make one react different to things which would be difficult without wd already.

I hope that you will have good, cheering time with your son and your daughte in law and I hope that you are good.