54 minutes ago, Pokey449 said:

@skamen Hi Svetla. I’m in a similar boat as you when considering travel. I’ve been wanting to travel to be with my wife and kids in another state but there’s no way so far that I’ve been able to handle the crowds , noise and chaos of air travel. I have many days I can’t get off the couch and out of the house to run simple errands. The last few days i have been thinking my sleep was finally stabilizing and I was starting to have some hope that I could travel soon. But then that hope was dashed last night with another terrible night leaving me exhausted today. I need a period of stability before I’m willing to risk leaving the safety of home for traveling. I also don’t want to drag my misery to my daughter’s house. I’m no fun to be around like this

@Pokey449 . It's hard to travel when on this situation, but it will improve in time. This journey is hard and weird. I love to travel by plane, but my body still not there, but I can travel by car. I cannot go and visit my parents, but I can talk over the phone with no issues. Weird what we are dealing with. I hope things improve for all of us...

If you have had windows and waves, you are in the right path. Keep holding. You have being doing great.

@Raymond I’m just so damned tired of it all. Today I’m on the edge of hopelessness. I thought last night was going to be a good night when I turned the lights how. Felt relaxed with a sense of wellness. But it was not meant to be. Awoke in misery, laid awake for an hour plus. Fell back to sleep only to awaken finally feeling terrible. Exhausted today. I’m burned out!!

@Pokey449, you have experienced nights with more than 7 hours straight sleep. It is a huge proof that your CNS is healing. Concentrate on this fact. I am still waiting for such a window. Hope for better days in time.

Svetla

@skamen Svetla. it may be irrelevant but I’ve not had any nights of 7 STRAIGHT hours of sleep for a long time. I have had a few nights thus far where I’ve gotten 6-7 hours total sleep but had multiple awakenings with unpleasant symptoms, waking finally still very tired. I don’t remember the last time I had a normal uninterrupted refreshing nights sleep That said I know you’re desperate for even a few hours sleep at night. I hope it comes to you very soon. I’ll keep you in my bedtime prayers.

Does someone experience a brain fog? It lasts for me 16 months after CT and 4 months after the last dose of Mirtazipine. I am like in scaphandar, it is awful.

1 hour ago, skamen said:

Does someone experience a brain fog? It lasts for me 16 months after CT and 4 months after the last dose of Mirtazipine. I am like in scaphandar, it is awful.

@skamen I’ve had constant brain fog since I CT’d Cymbalta over a year ago, through all my different med changes. It varies in intensity for me now — on better days it lowers and on bad days it can get really severe. I’m really looking forward to a nice window where it lifts entirely. Sorry for your suffering, that’s a tough symptom to have on top of everything else you’re going through. Hoping you get some relief soon 💜.

You are a sweet person, @SarahMc. Thank you for your presence in this forum.

Svetla

Yes Svetla I have the same thing. I feel like I am wearing a скафандр. Has your sleep gotten any better?

Thank you for asking, @Dnepr1234. This скафандр is real Hell in addition to every else. My sleep stays broken, I wake every 2 hours 12, 02, 04 from rush of cortisol and around 6:00 I cannot stay any more in bed. I feel a terror when this cortisol comes. And how about you?

Светла

Hi Светла, yeah it’s been pretty rough for me too. Internal Akathisia, tremor, electrical feeling, very low mood. Can’t complain about sleep but everything else is just unbearable.

Sending you a hug ❤️

On 7/7/2026 at 3:33 AM, Nemina said:

Dear Svetla, You’re not alone either. Whenever I read a success story, I think of you. "One day, Svetla will write a story like that too... " It seems endless, but that’s a lie. It isn’t endless; the day will come. Hang in there! Thinking of you and praying for You. ❤️

@skamen , I agree with @Nemina . Keep surviving. Your success story will be amazing. You are just 3 months completely off the drugs. My cortisol was through the roof during this time, and every day was pure survival. This horror will eventually start passing. Looking forward to your first window. Really praying you get some glimmers soon for some hope. You so deserve it.❤️🙏

On 7/17/2026 at 5:06 PM, skamen said:

Does someone experience a brain fog? It lasts for me 16 months after CT and 4 months after the last dose of Mirtazipine. I am like in scaphandar, it is awful.

Yes, it can last long. At this point in 20 months, it's an on and off symptom for me, but I'm still tapering..

@skamen what is скафандр, if my Russian which I studied many years ago, serves me still that translates to scafandr??

Yes, @Pokey449, you right, it is skafandr. Do you speak Russian? How are you today?

Svetla

Hi Svetla: I took 2 years of private Russian lessons when I lived in Spokane Washington from a Ukrainian lady who, according to her, escaped out of the then USSR under Brezhnev. I took her lessons during/after Glasnost/Peristroika. I was interested in offering guided fishing trips in Eastern Siberia at the same time I was doing guided trips on wilderness rivers in Alaska. The trips never came to pass and I let my Russian slide. I recall some of it and recognize some of the alphabet still, amazingly.

ps. Im better today than the last 2 says. Its still very much up & down.

Good morning Svetla. How are you today? Are you seeing any relief from your symptoms?

I wanted know if I could ask you to describe your physical symptoms of what you are calling cortisol spikes and how often they occur & how long the symptoms last each time they happen. I think I’m having cortisol issues too. I awaken multiple times in the night feel very restless, nauseous and can’t lay still. I get up and “work it off” go back to sleep to awaken again later with the same symptoms. Does this sound anything like what your are experiencing? Spaceba😁

Zdravstvuite, @Pokey449. Last night was horrendous, I awaken at midnight, after at 2:30 and was not able to sleep until 5 :00. The cortisol hit me again at 6:00 and was unable to stay in bed. The sensation is awful, inner akatisia, nausea, internal tension. Usually the cortisol spikes come every 2 hours: 12, 02, 04, 06 o'clock. It is like a wave of very strong anxiety, almost a terror which stays around 5 minutes. Often, but not always, with sweat. Last night it was all the time a strong anxiety, I was in real terror almost all the night. And like you, I am nauseous and cannot lay still. And every time I go back to sleep I awaken with the same symptoms 2 hours later. Hell, Inhumane Hell.

Svetla

@skamen sounds similar to what I’m experiencing. Not as bad as what you are dealing with though We all are a bit different in how this misery hits us. I presume it depends on lots of variables. Will keep you in my bedtime prayer. Спокойной ночи!! I remembered how to say it, but not how to spell it in Cyrillic. So I googled it 😁 Take care.

Hi @skamen and @Pokey449

I guess I’m part of the group who has these horrific nights with cortisol/adrenaline.

The last 5 days I had adrenaline all day long, stomach pain, mouth pain, and of course no sleeping more than 2/3 hours a night. Have you experienced it all day long? How do you manage this?

Thank you and hang in there!

@Healing_s @skamen no it does not normally affect me all day long. I can have fair-decent days only to be hammered again at night with cortisol induced Akathisia. I’ve got the added complication of having sleep apnea and having to fight with a cpap mask & breathing complications at night. Plus low back pain.

Ps. The day after a horrible night I do feel pretty awful all day long but I don’t know that is all of only due to cortisol.

Hey @Pokey449

Been dealing with adrenaline/cortisol all day. And it goes way up if I don’t eat.

How do you manage to sleep like this? Any technique? Or anything that could be helpful? I’m quite despair, cause I haven’t been sleeping more than one hour and half last nights. So I’m really struggling here.

I don’t really know the answer to your question as to how I can get some sleep some nights. Other nights horrible sleep. Exercise helps some but I’m incapable of doing so every day. So far my sleep is pretty hit & miss

@Healing_s, I feel you very well. My cortisol/adrenaline spikes are awful. As you, I have a 2-3 hours broken sleep. The cortisol rushes come with sweats and feeling of terror and depression. And in the morning around 5:30 the sensation of agony is hellish. I cannot stay more in bed. The stomach pains and nausea are awful also. I take a slice of ginger to try to calm these pains. During the day I am like electrocuted. When the situation is unbearable I put a plastic bag of ice in the middle of the chest. I don't know if this calms me, at least I try something...

Svetla