4 hours ago, Healing_s said:

Hi @skamen and @Pokey449

I guess I’m part of the group who has these horrific nights with cortisol/adrenaline.

The last 5 days I had adrenaline all day long, stomach pain, mouth pain, and of course no sleeping more than 2/3 hours a night. Have you experienced it all day long? How do you manage this?

Thank you and hang in there!

@Healing_s ... unfortunately, sleep is one of the symptoms that get healed last for many people. I'm on 29 months journey and my first 5 to 7 months, I only slept 3 to 4 hours. Now, on average, I'm sleeping 5 to 6 hours and few occasions, I slept more than 7 hours. In 20 months, I still wakes up between 530 an to 630am. I just go to sleep earlier so I can have enough sleep.

I also see that you did pretty much a cold Turkey, which it's hard and the journey might take longer to heal. I'm going based on your signature.

It's never good to reduce more than 10% per 4 to 6 weeks.

You were on these medications alot of years , so your nervous system is very sensitive at this time. It takes time for the system to heal. Of course, everyone is different. My advice is to continue holding. The body knows how to heal...

On 7/18/2026 at 12:06 AM, skamen said:

Does someone experience a brain fog?

I know pretty well what you are experiencing, sorry, I hope you won't be mad if I ask, with a slightly teasing tone,

whether that's a rhetorical question.🤣

Hi @skamen Svetla. Sounds like you are still having a pretty tough time of it. I’m really sorry and have an idea of what you are going through though my symptoms are different. Are you able to get out of the house at all and get some exercise or do anything to divert yourself? I know, hard to do. Wishing you some peace and comfort. Think about you often. Take care

Dear @Pokey449, thank you to contact me, it means a lot. I go for a walk often. I try to read something to distract me, but the concentration is not here. Awful WD. How are you, Pokey, today?

Svetla

Edited July 27Jul 27 by skamen

@skamen I’m not doing very well today. WD symptoms keep coming back. Another terrible night again last night. And I’m all alone. The loneliness really closes in on me , especially at night when I jolt awake and have to get up and go to my recliner to work off the pain in my back. . The dark empty house engulfs me. The loneliness actually scares me. I need to go be with my family but travel is out of the question now🥲 I keep hoping for a window that seems like it will never come.

Hello @skamen , thinking about you… You are so brave, your endurance will pay off , I keep praying for you ❤️

@Pokey449, I feel you very much. I have a ticket for Sofia via Francfort (2 flights) but I cannot imagine to travel in the situation I am. One night flight to Germany and another one to Bulgaria 2 hours later... I struggle for staying alive... My daughter pushes me all the time, for her it will be a distraction I need, but the people don't understand the whidrowal, nobody except the persons in this site can even imagine what happened with our CNS. She pushes me also to go meet with a psychologist to cure my "fear" of the plane. But she doesn't understand that it is not a psychological fear, it is produced from my brain in WD... Oh, Pokey...

Svetla

@skamen I understand you perfectly and why your family doesnt understand. Anybody who’s never been in our shoes can understand the hell we are enduring. I voice message from Horowitz today. I had an email/voice message session with him explaining all my symptoms and difficulties. He didn’t offer me much in the way of encouraging options. I’m apparently in protracted WD. Given that and an analysis of my symptoms I don’t have a lot of hope tonight. 😩

@skamen Sending some love dear Svetla, I always think of you, each day is a little step closer to feeling better xxxxx

@skamen

She pushes me also to go meet with a psychologist to cure my "fear" of the plane. But she doesn't understand that it is not a psychological fear, it is produced from my brain in WD...

Because isn't actually not some common-sense anxiety. You were correct pretty much saying that we can't find our real word for this. Internal akathisia might be the fair one, but it doesn't explain that inner "psychological" tension. In this state, we have to survive every moment with internal feeling that everything is scary and this is something else comparing to just an anxiety...

15 hours ago, skamen said:

Dear @Pokey449, thank you to contact me, it means a lot. I go for a walk often. I try to read something to distract me, but the concentration is not here. Awful WD. How are you, Pokey, today?

Svetla

Think of you often, Svetla ! 💗

I’m glad to hear you go for walks ☀️

11 hours ago, skamen said:

@Pokey449, I feel you very much. I have a ticket for Sofia via Francfort (2 flights) but I cannot imagine to travel in the situation I am. One night flight to Germany and another one to Bulgaria 2 hours later... I struggle for staying alive... My daughter pushes me all the time, for her it will be a distraction I need, but the people don't understand the whidrowal, nobody except the persons in this site can even imagine what happened with our CNS. She pushes me also to go meet with a psychologist to cure my "fear" of the plane. But she doesn't understand that it is not a psychological fear, it is produced from my brain in WD... Oh, Pokey...

Svetla

I’m so sorry Svetla, I empathize a lot with needing to limit ourselves (I absolutely could not fly to Europe right now!) and with others not really understanding our limitations. Please do what’s best for you, your health and wellbeing always come first🙏🏼. We all understand and we are here for you no matter what.

12 hours ago, skamen said:

fear" of the plane. But she doesn't understand that it is not a psychological fear, it is produced from my brain in WD... Oh,

I love planes and I used to travel a lot, but being on this journey, it's impossible to take a plane. The fear is real and it's not psychological. It's our brain adjustment. Like you say, people will not understand unless they go through this journey.

I can only travel by car at this time and who knows when am I going to be able to travel by plane again to see family members....

Hang in there. Do not push it!

Thank you, @Raymond. I cannot recognize myself, in any points, my life has really stopped since February 2024...

38 minutes ago, skamen said:

Thank you, @Raymond. I cannot recognize myself, in any points, my life has really stopped since February 2024...

It's 😢 but we will get there eventually. I'm hoping my tapering goes smoothly. I can't wait to get out of it, but cold turkey not an option.... 😢.......I feel you in this feeling.....

@skamen it is good that you walk regularly.

Anything you can do to promote health and wellbeing that's not too much is good for you and stops other health problems from piling up.

@skamen hi Svetla. I messed up and missed my dose of mirtazapine Wednesday night. I don’t know how I did that other than I’m just not coherent some days & have a hard time keeping track of everything. It’s easy for me to zone out. I’m feeling pretty rotten today as a result of my screw up.

How are you today?

Hi @Pokey449. Try to not thinking more of this. It was Wednesday night, and you restarted your right schedule yesterday night. I think this won't perturb your brain. It is only once. Look at me: I am already month 5 without drug changes, and my suffering is endless. I cannot stay in bed after 5 a m. because of the cortisol and the feeling of terror and dying. During the day the anxiety and the depression kill me. It is a living Hell.

And how are you today, Pokey?

Svetla

Edited July 31Jul 31 by skamen

@skamen something is perturbing my brain. I feel pretty rotten. I woke up at 230 and that was it for the night. Felt very restless. Couldn’t relax enough to go back to sleep. Got up at 5. Had a light breakfast but am nauseous, anxious and don’t feel well. I often think I’m never going to stabilize as I think having both Mirt and doxepin in my system is a bad mix

@skamen how are you today Svetla. Have you had any relief? I feel like I’ve been progressively getting worse. Only 2.5hrs sleep last night. I’ve been at by the same dose 165 days. I keep thinking I should be getting better, but just opposite.

I hope you are finally getting some relief. its river due for you.

Dear @Pokey449, I am awful. Like you, I got only 3 and half hours broken sleep last night. The hellish cortisol makes me awake every 2 hours. Last night it was at 12, after that at 2:30 and that was all. Horrendous feeling of terror + sweats,looping thoughts, chest pressure, nausea, back pains. All day dark depression, anhedonia, brain fog, agony. I am 130 days without drug, constant, and it goes worse. My flight to Europe is on 2 of September but I can't imagine now how I will be able to do it, for the moment it is impossible. We are in the same Hell, Pokey. What a mess with these poisons... Stolen years of our lives.

Svetla

Edited August 3Aug 3 by skamen

@skamen Svetla I’m so sorry you feel so miserable. While my sxs are somewhat different I understand your misery. I’m supposed to make a trip September 7 but I’m having my doubts. I had a doctors appointment today that I had to reschedule. I felt to awful to go and I had no business driving. I have two appointments tomorrow. 🤞🤞

I hope we both get some sorely needed sleep tonight. Take care

@skamen Can I ask you, where exactly is your back-pain felt. Is it lower back pain or does it feel higher, behind your solar plexus area?

@The Dust, my back pain is higher, and at evening time I have pain in the solar plexus.

5 minutes ago, skamen said:

@The Dust, my back pain is higher, and at evening time I have pain in the solar plexus.

I'm sorry, I can say the same for myself. I don't have lower back-pain, but it appear very high. it felt sharp and it's felt like it's moving into my spinal cord.