2 hours ago, Chippy said:

I think this is very true, we have no way of knowing how someone will react to either. I think the reason your experience of RI and updosing was not good was due to the dose. Very small dose RI have been very successful so far on here, and altough that doesn't mean they will always work out for people I think they often save lives. I also strongly believe that if you updose back to the last dose before a cut, within a week or two, that causes strong symptoms this can be a good move that people are too scared to make sometimes through fear of rocking the boat. Im not alone in my thoughts on this, Mark Horowitz, Nicole Lamberson and Anders Sorenson all think along these lines too I believe. Anders actually suspects holding rather than updosing is possibly not a good idea in this situation and it can make you worse, and I am inclined to agree. They can be very useful tools imo. But small and cautious and in the right situation is key. Holding is more often however the smart move I think.

I think I had come across Ander's thoughts around holding not always being good , hence my concern with holding. However given my situation, I think holding is safest.

I was getting a bit confused. I went way past the week from last cut so it was too late for me. This would have played a part in it not being so successful.

So hold it is for me.

23 hours ago, Wombat said:

Dear Tracey, I am so happy to read this. What a lovely relief for you. I do truly hope it lasts a good long while. Your body is healing.

Wishing you a very restful day. I know you have so much to do, but just pace yourself.

Best wishes

Wombat

Dear Wombat, thank you xx

Yes just so unfortunate I am in a huge life transition. Things are just so much harder.

I am in my other day aggravation day today. Not good, the doom, worry, anxiety, frozen and can't focus. But I am hopeful tomorrow will be better. I would LOVE a few days in a row.

Whilst I woke too early, I wasn't thrown into dread and cortisol activation which always happens on a bad day. So two mornings in a row of minimal cortisol. It came on me a bit later today.

Hope I get a break later.

17 hours ago, Chippy said:

@Tracey so happy to read of your relief, great signs of healing right there. You are so strong and brave enduring all this. We are right there with you. Sending lots of love xxxxx

Thank you @Chippy ,

I have never seen myself as strong and brave but many people are telling me that lately. I had no idea things could get so frightening and intense.

Appreciate your support. 🙏

Dear Tracey, you are proving yourself to be incredibly strong and brave.

You have things to do and they are getting done even when you are feeling so badly.

Last year I had an event coming up (a good event) and I shook for 3 months non-stop. The minute the event was over I was back to WD Normal. Your body may just be over reacting to what's going on in your life right now. I know mine would be!!!

I understand how difficult it is to try and work out whether to hold or try a tiny cut.

I have reached tachyphylaxis so it is a fine line trying to work out holding, the next cut, and not cutting too much.

The fact that Windows are starting to appear may mean you are heading towards stabilisation. I have seen lots of people in that alternate day problem. We will hope for a better day tomorrow, and that the symptoms will calm down quickly today.

Thinking of you

Wombat

3 hours ago, Wombat said:

Dear Tracey, you are proving yourself to be incredibly strong and brave.

You have things to do and they are getting done even when you are feeling so badly.

Last year I had an event coming up (a good event) and I shook for 3 months non-stop. The minute the event was over I was back to WD Normal. Your body may just be over reacting to what's going on in your life right now. I know mine would be!!!

I understand how difficult it is to try and work out whether to hold or try a tiny cut.

I have reached tachyphylaxis so it is a fine line trying to work out holding, the next cut, and not cutting too much.

The fact that Windows are starting to appear may mean you are heading towards stabilisation. I have seen lots of people in that alternate day problem. We will hope for a better day tomorrow, and that the symptoms will calm down quickly today.

Thinking of you

Wombat

Thank you @Wombat , sharing your experience is very helpful. I will get to your story when my move is over.

Yes it could be all the huge life stress. I think both things are happening for the perfect storm. Taper and life stuff together. I am in no head space to start measuring a new dose at the moment. My 7 mg is fairly easy, although still room for error.

I will need help on here for my measurements, they somewhere in my thread as I had thought about it. It will so much less than 10% and maybe the divided over the month as in brass monkey (from SA). But measuring accurately will be a challenge at the best of times.

I hope your next step is okay when you decide to do your next cut.

Thanks for your encouragement.

5 hours ago, Tracey said:

I think I had come across Ander's thoughts around holding not always being good , hence my concern with holding. However given my situation, I think holding is safest.

I was getting a bit confused. I went way past the week from last cut so it was too late for me. This would have played a part in it not being so successful.

So hold it is for me.

Yeah I think it's like RI, the longer you leave it the more unpredictable. Probably under month it's worth going straight back to the previous dose, sooner the better, but after that, much more caution needs to be applied, and as with you it was too activating so hold is your friend for sure.

@Tracey I'm glad you experienced some relief.

Do you feel as though tapering through 2025 caught up with you eventually?

Perhaps when you resume, you could try to factor in some scheduled, slightly longer holds that might allow you to continue without reaching a point where you need to hold for a longer time?

49 minutes ago, Chippy said:

Yeah I think it's like RI, the longer you leave it the more unpredictable. Probably under month it's worth going straight back to the previous dose, sooner the better, but after that, much more caution needs to be applied, and as with you it was too activating so hold is your friend for sure.

Yes hold it is and I am in no state to measure and change dose until my move is well behind me.

I can't afford a micro pipette either, so I will be diluting more (1 part drug to 2 part water to start with) and using normal syringe. Not perfect but the best I can do.

Right now the thought of it scares me. 😞.

27 minutes ago, Luke said:

@Tracey I'm glad you experienced some relief.

Do you feel as though tapering through 2025 caught up with you eventually?

Perhaps when you resume, you could try to factor in some scheduled, slightly longer holds that might allow you to continue without reaching a point where you need to hold for a longer time?

Hello Luke,

I am not sure, but quite likely. The combination of my highly stressful life and tapering was a bomb waiting to go off, unbeknown to me until after the event.

I could do longer holds (> month) or smaller cuts. It would be easier logistically to do a 5. % cut with longer hold rather smaller more frequent. Cross that bridge closer to time I guess. Daunting.

4 minutes ago, Tracey said:

Yes hold it is and I am in no state to measure and change dose until my move is well behind me.

I can't afford a micro pipette either, so I will be diluting more (1 part drug to 2 part water to start with) and using normal syringe. Not perfect but the best I can do.

Right now the thought of it scares me. 😞.

Don't even worry about the taper, just deal with stablising first.

I think a syringe is completely fine tbh and you can just keep diluting the dose as you need to keep precision there anyway, few use a Pipette, it's starting to gain traction but most don't still.

That is exactly how I am doing my meds at the moment. With a 1:2 ratio and syringes.

I know the fear of changing things or making a drop. I have been holding the last 3 months and dreading starting the taper again.

I think don't worry about those things at the moment. Stabilising is key.

Do your move and settle in, then relook at the taper plans.

Wombat

2 hours ago, Chippy said:

Don't even worry about the taper, just deal with stablising first.

I think a syringe is completely fine tbh and you can just keep diluting the dose as you need to keep precision there anyway, few use a Pipette, it's starting to gain traction but most don't still.

Reassuring , thanks @Chippy .

1 hour ago, Wombat said:

That is exactly how I am doing my meds at the moment. With a 1:2 ratio and syringes.

I know the fear of changing things or making a drop. I have been holding the last 3 months and dreading starting the taper again.

I think don't worry about those things at the moment. Stabilising is key.

Do your move and settle in, then relook at the taper plans.

Wombat

I may start a 1:2 before resuming taper, more room for less than exact measurements the more dilute it is. Currently doing a 1:1.

Enjoy your night @Wombat .

Wishing you a restful sleep

Well a dreadful day today with nausea , burning skin and a head so heavy with big cloud, doom, dizziness ( new symptom). Today is my every other bad day. Yesterday should have been good but wasn't really although better than today.

What is going on as am not getting much better at all. 😢😢.

My fear of the future is unbearable when I am so unwell.

A change in pattern over the past 4 mornings is that awful cortisol spike with doom and anxiety that has been coming on at 4-5 am is not happening until 7 ish after I have been awake for an hour and had hot drink and fruit . Ususlly get up at 6 am.

I have had that nice relaxed whole body feeling instead from about 4 - 6 am and almost doze off.

This is all so frightening, I know. keep repeating myself but it is so hard. 😞

So sorry for your suffering @Tracey. Thinking of you today. Brighter days are ahead 💜

4 hours ago, SarahMc said:

So sorry for your suffering @Tracey. Thinking of you today. Brighter days are ahead 💜

Thanks @SarahMc .

No matter how many times I keep saying that it is the withdrawal and brain trying to heal, I get so swamped when in a bad wave period and there is just no way out until it just lifts or passes which can be all day or longer. The days seem like years.

It has such a grip at the time, so powerful. So cruel. I can't distract and i can't rest and be present (trying to ) when it is at its height.

Hope you are doing okay yourself @SarahMc xx

Hi @Tracey

I’m so sorry it’s all so intense.

I’m in a very intense wave day, too. Just unbelievable after a pretty good day yesterday.

Hang on tight 💗

14 hours ago, Tracey said:

My fear of the future is unbearable when I am so unwell.

I share your sentiment @Tracey . A deep sense of foreboding has settled on me. 😱

3 hours ago, Finni said:

Hi @Tracey

I’m so sorry it’s all so intense.

I’m in a very intense wave day, too. Just unbelievable after a pretty good day yesterday.

Hang on tight 💗

Thanks @Finni , is really hard and no life really. I started pretty calm, but starting to come on a bit now. Often does late morning if it hasn't already started earlier in day.

This is my every second better day, so slightly better than yesterday but not the relief I had hoped for.

You hang on tight also 💚

1 hour ago, Catbird said:

I share your sentiment @Tracey . A deep sense of foreboding has settled on me. 😱

Yes such a challenge 😞

22 hours ago, Tracey said:

Well a dreadful day today with nausea , burning skin and a head so heavy with big cloud, doom, dizziness ( new symptom). Today is my every other bad day. Yesterday should have been good but wasn't really although better than today.

What is going on as am not getting much better at all. 😢😢.

My fear of the future is unbearable when I am so unwell.

A change in pattern over the past 4 mornings is that awful cortisol spike with doom and anxiety that has been coming on at 4-5 am is not happening until 7 ish after I have been awake for an hour and had hot drink and fruit . Ususlly get up at 6 am.

I have had that nice relaxed whole body feeling instead from about 4 - 6 am and almost doze off.

This is all so frightening, I know. keep repeating myself but it is so hard. 😞

Very sorry to read @Tracey some change happening there for you, all good signs, body recalibrating, what a journey I know, but have got this, it won't be this way forever. Better days are coming xxxxx

14 hours ago, Tracey said:

No matter how many times I keep saying that it is the withdrawal and brain trying to heal, I get so swamped when in a bad wave period and there is just no way out until it just lifts or passes which can be all day or longer. The days seem like years.

It has such a grip at the time, so powerful. So cruel. I can't distract and i can't rest and be present (trying to ) when it is at its height.

I completely understand, some days the symptoms are just overwhelming and it feels impossible to cope. On those days all I can do is try to remember the good days and repeat to myself that it won’t be like this forever.

I hope today was better for you.

14 hours ago, Tracey said:

Hope you are doing okay yourself @SarahMc xx

Thanks @Tracey, things are still pretty up and down for me and super random in terms of what symptoms will be present on any given day. I had a pretty nice little window yesterday, but today the intense brain fog is back — but not many physical symptoms! It all feels a bit like a cruel cosmic joke sometimes 🤷‍♀️🧐

10 hours ago, Tracey said:

Thanks @Finni , is really hard and no life really. I started pretty calm, but starting to come on a bit now. Often does late morning if it hasn't already started earlier in day.

This is my every second better day, so slightly better than yesterday but not the relief I had hoped for.

You hang on tight also 💚

I’m basically on that pattern myself

Did I read that you had a time when the sertraline was causing reactions right after you took it?

I’m having reactions to mirtazapine after I take it and I don’t know if there’s a way around this

Edited June 22Jun 22 by Finni

On 6/22/2026 at 5:54 PM, Chippy said:

Very sorry to read @Tracey some change happening there for you, all good signs, body recalibrating, what a journey I know, but have got this, it won't be this way forever. Better days are coming xxxxx

Yes there is change happening, at least I am

not waking with doom and body that can't relax.

Thanks Chippy xx

1 hour ago, Tracey said:

Yes there is change happening, at least I am

not waking with doom and body that can't relax.

Thanks Chippy xx

So good to recognise that Tracey. Little gains add up. Xxx