3 hours ago, Chippy said:

Feel this one deeply Raymon! You are an inspiration my friend.

I'm trying hard and trying to ignore it, and only time will tell...

 

We will get out of this and maybe someday , we can meet somewhere and 🥳...

1 minute ago, Raymond said:

We will get out of this and maybe someday , we can meet somewhere and 🥳...

Oh wouldn’t that be a great day!

6 hours ago, Raymond said:

04/14/2026- woke up from alarm and recovery process...

 

Yesterday, I was anxious or feeling hot and chest pressure/tightness on a off during the morning and afternoon.   I got theses symptoms for like 45 minutes.  Then gone, then came back for few minutes until gone in the late afternoon..

 

This morning, I woke up due to my alarm again at 530am.  I got used to this hour to do my prayers before starting to work.  

 

My head feels ok now.  Some intrusive thoughts, tiredness.  If I get anxious, I will see later during the day.  I'm going through some personal issues which I hope things will eventually resolve.

 

I still feel little work anxiety.  The work fear has faded away a lot more.

 

Concentration is on and off.

 

Feel muscle stiffness back of neck, but not painful.

 

Muscle stiffness on right arm on and off but not painful...

 

Let see how I end up feeling today.  My goal is to try to concentrate as much as I can.  Work and out headphones to listen to few podcasts, or even listen to movies while I work.... 😆 

 

My routine is the same every day to distract myself from this journey....

 

 

Anxiety can cause such a variety of physical and mental symptoms, it can really be miserable.  During recovery,  I did find work somewhat therapeutic. It gave me a sense of control over what I was doing, and it forced me to think about something other than my thoughts and feelings.  Anything that gets us out of own heads for a while is helpful. 

20 minutes ago, mstimc60 said:

Anxiety can cause such a variety of physical and mental symptoms, it can really be miserable.  During recovery,  I did find work somewhat therapeutic. It gave me a sense of control over what I was doing, and it forced me to think about something other than my thoughts and feelings.  Anything that gets us out of own heads for a while is helpful. 

This is definitely terrible journey.   In the beginning, I was experiencing work fear.  Emails were giving panic.  I don't know how I managed to work, but I kept going.   My boss will send me an email and my anxiety raised with fear.   

 

Now, I don't get fear, but I do still get anxious in a different level.  

 

I have noticed that instead of having anxiety/crawling sensation and feel burning sensation, I am only getting hot sensation in my back and sometimes head,and chest pressure. It usually  settles down within an hour or two.

 

It seems that at 4.79mg, I can control my mind even more ..

Edited April 14Apr 14 by Raymond
Adding comments

24 minutes ago, mstimc60 said:

Anxiety can cause such a variety of physical and mental symptoms, it can really be miserable.  During recovery,  I did find work somewhat therapeutic. It gave me a sense of control over what I was doing, and it forced me to think about something other than my thoughts and feelings.  Anything that gets us out of own heads for a while is helpful. 

You are my inspiration.  You were on paxil and got out of it....you give me a lot of hope.

 

04/14/2026- afternoon update.....

 

As I am going through though personal stressors, I have noticed that I don't get anxiety/crawling sensation and burning sensations.  I only feel little anxious with hot sensation on my back.  Also, it's ups and down and resolving within an hour.

 

Another improvement that I noticed this past week is that I feel like hugging my family.  I have been more loving toward all of them.  This is something I used to do before medication, but I guess the medication took away affections... yet, I'm still numb in few areas, but I just noticed that despite the struggles I'm having, I'm also more loving toward everyone....

 

This stuff really messed myself....

2 minutes ago, Raymond said:

You are my inspiration.  You were on paxil and got out of it....you give me a lot of hope.

 

Thank you, Raymond, that means so much to me!  Paxil is a nasty one.  It made me gain about 20 pounds and numbed me to the point I didn't care. And it never really helped with my anxiety or OCD much.  It takes time but you can get through it!

 

04/15/2026- recovery process...

Yesterday, I was anxious on and off mostly in the morning and feeling hot sensation in my back and chest pressure . I felt all of it for an hour, then it minimize, but few hours later, it was coming back...

During the late afternoon, I felt better. I was able to spend time with wife and children. I was able to coupe with stress a lot better.

My morning hours continue to be my issues. Based on what I have read from others who taper or recovered, I should get stable days with morning and nights feeling same. I haven't experienced this yet. I continue to have bad mornings and good afternoons. Although my bad mornings have shorten. Mostly feeling bad between 7am to 10am. After that, my energy and motivation usually increases.

This morning, I woke up at 530am due to my alarm, but I also felt like tingling sensation in my top brain, and hot sensations in my back.

They continue to be on and off.

I still feel a little work fear in the background and it seems to be slowly improving like a snail.

I feel like I want to sleep more, but I can't.

My main stressor this last week it's gone, so I'm hoping I can recover soon.

Let see how I end up today...as time go on, I will post my progress. I'm hoping to be able to concentrate at work and be able to interpreter what I'm reading. I have used chatgpt to help me out... 😂 Crazy how our mind and simple task are affected by these medications...

In the name of Jesus, we will heal... patience, acceptance, faith, and prayer....

04/16/2026- mess recovery process...

These last days were not great for me. Having anxious body and nerveness during the morning hours.

My work morning fear sensation came back, lack of concentration, intrusive thoughts, muscle stiffness on and off moving from one side of body to next, stomach gasses and feels little tideness too.

I feel off this morning and trying to concentrate in my job....

I hope to get better in the next hour or so....

When I was in the worst of WD and at work, I'd loop a mediation music video on my laptop to calm my system. It helped to keep me focused and made me pay attention to it instead of my symptoms. It didn't work great all the time but it did help.

24 minutes ago, mstimc60 said:

When I was in the worst of WD and at work, I'd loop a mediation music video on my laptop to calm my system. It helped to keep me focused and made me pay attention to it instead of my symptoms. It didn't work great all the time but it did help.

Yes, I do that but some days are just terrible..I am glad , I work from home. It helps a little bit more

4 minutes ago, Raymond said:

Yes, I do that but some days are just terrible..I am glad , I work from home. It helps a little bit more

That's why we're here--to help you get through the rough days!

1 hour ago, Raymond said:

04/16/2026- mess recovery process...

These last days were not great for me. Having anxious body and nerveness during the morning hours.

My work morning fear sensation came back, lack of concentration, intrusive thoughts, muscle stiffness on and off moving from one side of body to next, stoSorry to hear Raymond, these unexpected fluctuations that come unexpectedly, very frustrating I totally understand but they don't slow down your tremendous progress, it will go as it comes, just let it be.

Hope it gets easier for you soon.mach gasses and feels little tideness too.

I feel off this morning and trying to concentrate in my job....

I hope to get better in the next hour or so....

Sorry to hear @Raymond these unexpected fluctuations that come unexpectedly can be very frustrating I totally understand but they don't slow down your tremendous progress, you are doing great and it will go as it comes, just let it be.

Hope it will ease for you soon.

04/17/2026- started taper tiny reduction to test waters....from .0716g (4.79mg) to .0714g (4.78mg).....

Ok, after analyzing my situation from my first taper until now, I decided to test the waters. For six months now, my symptoms are the same. Some days are better than others. Mornings are still not good but manageable. Afternoons gets better despite that lately, it's being little worst than previous months, but still manageable. My systems are better but still the same every day but not intense.

I remember that my first taper were a 1.4% cut and after each cut, I even felt better. Symptoms appeared after 7 days, but were manageable and short. At months 10, it's when I hit the wall of old symptoms coming back which I think it wasn't related to my cuts. I think it was because the system went back to heal deeply. Since October 2025, I have been holding until now.

In the last few weeks, I have felt the need to taper again and try a tiny cut. I think the body is asking for it, but you know this journey is painful so I hold longer.

My mornings are not perfect, but the only way to see if my body heals more is to continue Tapering, so I am reducing.0002mg.

Let see how my body reacts. If the tiny amount does not affects me, I will continue with tiny amount to tell my body to get ready ..

I believe that once I'm on a lower dose and my body is actually healed 80 percent, I think things will improve better.

I have read people that felt better after each cut even if we hits. My first three cuts, I actually felt better and I did not had WD on my first two cuts.

Again, the only way to know if I'm ready is to test the water. I sometimes feels like my body and brain wants cut more ..

In the name of Jesus, let's see how it goes ..

1 hour ago, Raymond said:

04/17/2026- started taper tiny reduction to test waters....from .0716g (4.79mg) to .0714g (4.78mg).....

Ok, after analyzing my situation from my first taper until now, I decided to test the waters. For six months now, my symptoms are the same. Some days are better than others. Mornings are still not good but manageable. Afternoons gets better despite that lately, it's being little worst than previous months, but still manageable. My systems are better but still the same every day but not intense.

I remember that my first taper were a 1.4% cut and after each cut, I even felt better. Symptoms appeared after 7 days, but were manageable and short. At months 10, it's when I hit the wall of old symptoms coming back which I think it wasn't related to my cuts. I think it was because the system went back to heal deeply. Since October 2025, I have been holding until now.

In the last few weeks, I have felt the need to taper again and try a tiny cut. I think the body is asking for it, but you know this journey is painful so I hold longer.

My mornings are not perfect, but the only way to see if my body heals more is to continue Tapering, so I am reducing.0002mg.

Let see how my body reacts. If the tiny amount does not affects me, I will continue with tiny amount to tell my body to get ready ..

I believe that once I'm on a lower dose and my body is actually healed 80 percent, I think things will improve better.

I have read people that felt better after each cut even if we hits. My first three cuts, I actually felt better and I did not had WD on my first two cuts.

Again, the only way to know if I'm ready is to test the water. I sometimes feels like my body and brain wants cut more ..

In the name of Jesus, let's see how it goes ..

Good luck Raymon. Hope it goes well. 😀

2 hours ago, Raymond said:

04/17/2026- started taper tiny reduction to test waters....from .0716g (4.79mg) to .0714g (4.78mg).....

Ok, after analyzing my situation from my first taper until now, I decided to test the waters. For six months now, my symptoms are the same. Some days are better than others. Mornings are still not good but manageable. Afternoons gets better despite that lately, it's being little worst than previous months, but still manageable. My systems are better but still the same every day but not intense.

I remember that my first taper were a 1.4% cut and after each cut, I even felt better. Symptoms appeared after 7 days, but were manageable and short. At months 10, it's when I hit the wall of old symptoms coming back which I think it wasn't related to my cuts. I think it was because the system went back to heal deeply. Since October 2025, I have been holding until now.

In the last few weeks, I have felt the need to taper again and try a tiny cut. I think the body is asking for it, but you know this journey is painful so I hold longer.

My mornings are not perfect, but the only way to see if my body heals more is to continue Tapering, so I am reducing.0002mg.

Let see how my body reacts. If the tiny amount does not affects me, I will continue with tiny amount to tell my body to get ready ..

I believe that once I'm on a lower dose and my body is actually healed 80 percent, I think things will improve better.

I have read people that felt better after each cut even if we hits. My first three cuts, I actually felt better and I did not had WD on my first two cuts.

Again, the only way to know if I'm ready is to test the water. I sometimes feels like my body and brain wants cut more ..

In the name of Jesus, let's see how it goes ..

Good luck Raymond! You can rest assured, it was a well-considered decision of yours over time and as you mentioned, you can't know until you try, I really hope that the only effect will be positive 👊👏

@Raymond Everything crossed for you..and yes I get maybe the body is asking for it . We have to take that leap of faith at some point ,hope yours has a smooth landing. 🙏

Good luck, @Raymond . We're right there with you!

26 minutes ago, mstimc60 said:

Good luck, @Raymond . We're right there with you!

What I don't understand is that I lower only .0002 and my brain feels better and relaxed. Is this coincidence or what?

My first three tapering, I felt better after taking the lower dose, but I hold all these months because I got old system returned in November.

I don't understand if lowering the dose got me today feeling better or it was just coincidence....

Edited April 17Apr 17 by Raymond
Adding comments

18 minutes ago, Raymond said:

What I don't understand is that I lower only .0002 and my brain feels better and relaxed. Is this coincidence or what?

My first three tapering, I felt better after taking the lower dose, but I hold all these months because I got old system returned in November.

I don't understand if lowering the dose got me today feeling better or it was just coincidence....

I've seen other comments that say for some reason your system gets more sensitive to changes at very low doses. Maybe its the lingering effect of the drug in your system as your brain adjusts to having almost no trace of meds left. Hang in there!

7 hours ago, Raymond said:

04/17/2026- started taper tiny reduction to test waters....from .0716g (4.79mg) to .0714g (4.78mg).....

Ok, after analyzing my situation from my first taper until now, I decided to test the waters. For six months now, my symptoms are the same. Some days are better than others. Mornings are still not good but manageable. Afternoons gets better despite that lately, it's being little worst than previous months, but still manageable. My systems are better but still the same every day but not intense.

I remember that my first taper were a 1.4% cut and after each cut, I even felt better. Symptoms appeared after 7 days, but were manageable and short. At months 10, it's when I hit the wall of old symptoms coming back which I think it wasn't related to my cuts. I think it was because the system went back to heal deeply. Since October 2025, I have been holding until now.

In the last few weeks, I have felt the need to taper again and try a tiny cut. I think the body is asking for it, but you know this journey is painful so I hold longer.

My mornings are not perfect, but the only way to see if my body heals more is to continue Tapering, so I am reducing.0002mg.

Let see how my body reacts. If the tiny amount does not affects me, I will continue with tiny amount to tell my body to get ready ..

I believe that once I'm on a lower dose and my body is actually healed 80 percent, I think things will improve better.

I have read people that felt better after each cut even if we hits. My first three cuts, I actually felt better and I did not had WD on my first two cuts.

Again, the only way to know if I'm ready is to test the water. I sometimes feels like my body and brain wants cut more ..

In the name of Jesus, let's see how it goes ..

Afternoon update...

I have been feeling a lot better than any of my last days. My mind is a lot more relax and body just feels little hot.

I don't know if it is because I drop my dose again, or just coincidence that today was going to be my good day...

1 minute ago, Raymond said:

Afternoon update...

I have been feeling a lot better than any of my last days. My mind is a lot more relax and body just feels little hot.

I don't know if it is because I drop my dose again, or just coincidence that today was going to be my good day...

Enjoy it while it's there, time will tell the rest, very glad for you!

I'm very glad for you, Raymon! Let's hope and pray this is a trend. I'm excited for you. In the name of Jesus, you will heal. ☺️❣️

13 hours ago, Raymond said:

What I don't understand is that I lower only .0002 and my brain feels better and relaxed. Is this coincidence or what?

My first three tapering, I felt better after taking the lower dose, but I hold all these months because I got old system returned in November.

I don't understand if lowering the dose got me today feeling better or it was just coincidence....

I think this is a good sign Raymon. You may have been right. The body is telling you it’s ok to taper perhaps. See how things go. 😀

04/18/2026- second day taper.... slept more...

Yesterday was a good day after days or weeks feeling up and down. After my new taper dose, I felt all day my mind relaxed. I did have few thoughts on and off but no big deal. Those resolved quickly.

Today, after six months, I woke up do to my alarm at 630am. I did woke like two times between 10pm and 630am, but went back to sleep. I had two dreams and one was a religious dream with Jesus.

Overall, I'm in bed but getting ready to do few things today.

In the name of Jesus, we will heal...