44 minutes ago, Finni said:

The only thing that is going to help me right now, according to Dr. Horowitz is just resignation and time
I wish I would’ve talked to him a few weeks ago

He says I should stay on 14.7 mg or gradually very very slowly get back to 15 mg just for convenience and stay there for the rest of the year at least

I’m sorry Finni. I wish there was more to say. I think I agree. If you do decide to go back up id definitely do it very very slowly. Like a reverse micro taper. 1/30, if you can be that accurate, each day or something like that. Trick your brain. Then as he said your on a whole dose. Up to you I guess if you want to do that or stay put. 

I’m in a horrible nervous system state with akasthisia, horrible burning, and electricity that comes and goes in different parts of my body and leaves me crying and pacing for much of the day now for the third day.

 

Does anyone think that if I go back to 15 mg I would get better?

Since this type of intensity didn’t start until after this reduction

The very severe symptoms hit me on day 13 and now it’s day 15

 

I did talk to Mark Horowitz yesterday and he said I could go back to 15 mg but just to get there slowly

He added something interesting though he said don’t expect him for it to make you better just expect for it to be more convenient so you don’t have to adjust the tablet every day and deal with these scales

 

Does anyone think that I would get better?

Has anyone had that experience with a very small up dose back to the dose before helped ease some symptoms?

@Finni sometimes a small updose helps. You could try 14.8 mg and see if anything improves or gets worse. 

I am sorry for your suffering....these drugs are so horrible....my heart goes out to you because so much is just guess work and trial and error. 

No one should have to experience this... ❤️🙏

Thank you @LostinCanada

i’m completely blindsided by this!

 

Never in 1 million years did I think that a small reduction would bring on this kind of reaction 2 weeks later 

17 minutes ago, LostinCanada said:

@Finni sometimes a small updose helps. You could try 14.8 mg and see if anything improves or gets worse. 

I am sorry for your suffering....these drugs are so horrible....my heart goes out to you because so much is just guess work and trial and error. 

No one should have to experience this... ❤️🙏

oh wow, I just reread this - gets worse? 
That would not be good because then I would have to go back down.

 

 

this feels like a nightmare

 

 

@LostinCanada

I looked at your signature and I see that you did a little updose. How did that go for you?
I know we have different nervous systems and that nothing is predictable…

❤️

6 minutes ago, Finni said:

gets worse

I don't want to make you think it will....the way we react once sensitive is unpredictable. Honestly, you had a lot of stress going on as well. I don't think it was just or even the dose change....it is so hard to tell because life doesn't just stop so we can heal. 

Initially there was a little positive that occurred when you dropped your dose. 

3 minutes ago, Finni said:

How did that go for you?

I never did an updose...just a reinstatement from a cold turkey.

I know some who have done a small updose with no issues. Your situation is a bit complex because of other too fast tapers and what seems like a negative reaction to the mirtazapine.

I think if you go slow like DrH mentioned....you minimize any issues. 

❤️🙏

Anyone who thinks ADs are easy have no clue.

Hey @Finni I’m so sorry you are going through this. 
 

If your worsening is due to the drop then putting it back may help but obviously you can’t be sure if it is. I agree with LIC and dr H if you want to be safe put a little back to test the water. 

I suspect that a long hold is what’s going to make the real difference here not an updose. 
 

My heart goes out to you. No one should have to endure this. Hang in there!

4 minutes ago, LostinCanada said:

I don't want to make you think it will....the way we react once sensitive is unpredictable. Honestly, you had a lot of stress going on as well. I don't think it was just or even the dose change....it is so hard to tell because life doesn't just stop so we can heal. 

Initially there was a little positive that occurred when you dropped your dose. 

I never did an updose...just a reinstatement from a cold turkey.

I know some who have done a small updose with no issues. Your situation is a bit complex because of other too fast tapers and what seems like a negative reaction to the mirtazapine.

I think if you go slow like DrH mentioned....you minimize any issues. 

❤️🙏

Anyone who thinks ADs are easy have no clue.

Thank you so much for responding. 
At one point in the conversation, Dr. Horowitz said maybe hold 14.7 for a month before I try to go back up to 15. 

I have the new more accurate scales coming Tuesday of next week and I might feel more comfortable then trying to go up a little bit. I just don’t know.

 

In your signature, I see a little increase in your 2023 Paxil toward the end…from July to September 

am I seeing that right?

15 minutes ago, Chippy said:

Hey @Finni I’m so sorry you are going through this. 
 

If your worsening is due to the drop then putting it back may help but obviously you can’t be sure if it is. I agree with LIC and dr H if you want to be safe put a little back to test the water. 

I suspect that a long hold is what’s going to make the real difference here not an updose. 
 

My heart goes out to you. No one should have to endure this. Hang in there!

Thank you! 
 

Right now I’m leaning toward staying where I am until I get my new scale Tuesday
 

It’s hard enough for my little Gemini scale to register .098. 

8 minutes ago, Finni said:

Thank you! 
 

Right now I’m leaning toward staying where I am until I get my new scale Tuesday
 

It’s hard enough for my little Gemini scale to register .098. 

I’m glad Dr H said to hang where you are for a month tbh. I think that may be your best option now. Sometimes, and tbh often, in this doing nothing is the best. I know that’s a hard thing to hear right now but in the long run I suspect it might be for the best. 

10 minutes ago, Chippy said:

I’m glad Dr H said to hang where you are for a month tbh. I think that may be your best option now. Sometimes, and tbh often, in this doing nothing is the best. I know that’s a hard thing to hear right now but in the long run I suspect it might be for the best. 

He said that at one point in the conversation …and then he would go back to saying just go up the very smallest that my scale would measure

 

ugh - I’m confused 

 

this stinks! 
 

Is there a point where I can no longer safely go up a little bit?

Just now, Finni said:

He said that at one point in the conversation …and then he would go back to saying just go up the very smallest that my scale would measure

 

ugh - I’m confused 

 

this stinks! 
 

Is there a point where I can no longer safely go up a little bit?

I think he wanted you to stay put for a month to let it settle a bit. Then he wanted you to slowly increase after so you could be on a single pill for convenience as your hold may be long term. 
 

Sorry it is all confusing sometimes. 
 

It really sucks 100%
 

The longer you leave it the more cautious you need to be. If you had just dropped and were stable before and having wd symptoms after the drop I’d say just updose to 15mg now. But this is more complicated than that. I don’t think most of what you are experiencing is because of the drop. I don’t know this for certain everyone is different. 
 

Wait till your scales come and see. Maybe you could do what I suggested earlier and just creep up 0.01mg per day and get back so gradually your brain doesn’t notice. Not sure how that works with your pill weight and scales. But do you see what I mean you mitigate the risk massively, add the drug back over the next month and still get back to a whole tablet. 3 birds one stone. Just an idea. 

51 minutes ago, Finni said:

In your signature, I see a little increase in your 2023 Paxil toward the end…from July to September 

am I seeing that right?

 

My signature reads:

Jul 2-4.9mg/ Jul 21-4.8mg/Jul 28-4.73mg/Aug 4-4.65mg /Sep 21-4.58 mg

 

No updose.

 

Because you are getting a better scale, I would cut a few on the Gem20 so you can weigh them on the new scale to see what weight variations you are getting.

0.098 could be 0.0976 or 0.0984

So it would be good to see if there is a consistent weight there. Definitely once the new scale comes you can be more accurate. 

Hopefully this will help with stability. ❤️🙏

8 minutes ago, LostinCanada said:

 

My signature reads:

Jul 2-4.9mg/ Jul 21-4.8mg/Jul 28-4.73mg/Aug 4-4.65mg /Sep 21-4.58 mg

 

No updose.

 

Because you are getting a better scale, I would cut a few on the Gem20 so you can weigh them on the new scale to see what weight variations you are getting.

0.098 could be 0.0976 or 0.0984

So it would be good to see if there is a consistent weight there. Definitely once the new scale comes you can be more accurate. 

Hopefully this will help with stability. ❤️🙏

Thanks for the tip! ❤️

 

(this is what I’m seeing: 3.95mg/Jul 18-3.92mg/Sep 25-3.9mg)

2 hours ago, Finni said:

Thanks for the tip! ❤️

 

(this is what I’m seeing: 3.95mg/Jul 18-3.92mg/Sep 25-3.9mg)

Yes that is 2025....slow tapering...no updose.. ☺️

14 minutes ago, LostinCanada said:

Yes that is 2025....slow tapering...no updose.. ☺️

Oh my gosh 

I’m not sure what my brain was doing! 
I looked at it several times and I’ll have to tell you tomorrow what I thought I was seeing…

I can’t see anything different than just a slow taper when I look at it now. Goodness gracious.

8 minutes ago, Finni said:

Goodness gracious

I have a splitting headache...it's been days of this ...so I was reading it over and wondering if I wasn't reading it right ... You have to love WD brain. 

53 minutes ago, LostinCanada said:

I have a splitting headache...it's been days of this ...so I was reading it over and wondering if I wasn't reading it right ... You have to love WD brain. 

I’m so sorry-

it’s going to be such a relief when your headache eases and then vanishes!
Hopefully very, very soon. 🦋🌿

yes, AD wd brain is bizarre, to say the very least

 

(Sorry for adding to the torture 😆 )

Edited March 12Mar 12 by Finni

I’ve been having horrible, horrible surges all day long with so much pain and electricity and pounding that I’ve just have to cry all day long

 

It feels like I’ve gone cold, turkey off of mirtazapine. That’s how extreme it is and my mom wants to take me to the emergency room.

I really wish I could go up on mirtazapine it just seems like this all hits so hard at day 13 after that reduction

 

I’m desperate for help if I knew that I could just get back on benzos without any paradoxical reactions I would do it and that says a lot because I’ve been off nearly a year and that’s what caused all of this nightmare to begin with.

 

But I can’t do this another day. It is incredibly incredibly painful.

5 hours ago, Finni said:

I’ve been having horrible, horrible surges all day long with so much pain and electricity and pounding that I’ve just have to cry all day long

 

It feels like I’ve gone cold, turkey off of mirtazapine. That’s how extreme it is and my mom wants to take me to the emergency room.

I really wish I could go up on mirtazapine it just seems like this all hits so hard at day 13 after that reduction

 

I’m desperate for help if I knew that I could just get back on benzos without any paradoxical reactions I would do it and that says a lot because I’ve been off nearly a year and that’s what caused all of this nightmare to begin with.

 

But I can’t do this another day. It is incredibly incredibly painful.

I’m so sorry @Finni I hate this for you. It’s all your body fighting to gain back normalcy. You are stronger than you think! Thinking of you. Xxx

Hey @Finni

 

I’m so very sorry that you’re struggling so much. As Chippy says, you really are stronger than you think. I was taken off Benzos too, the taper was 6 days for 10mg of Diazepam. I can remember those surges, it really did feel like electricity was flowing through me, it was inhumane but I can tell you it does get better, it really does! Just hang in there Finni and eventually things with turn, that electricity will ease and things will be more bearable. 
We’re all here for you Finni, just keeping grinding though this any way you can, brighter days are coming for you. 

Thinking of you 

 

Nick 

Is there any chance that slowly working back to 15 mg is going to make me feel better?

On 3/12/2026 at 1:46 PM, LostinCanada said:

I don't want to make you think it will....the way we react once sensitive is unpredictable. Honestly, you had a lot of stress going on as well. I don't think it was just or even the dose change....it is so hard to tell because life doesn't just stop so we can heal. 

Initially there was a little positive that occurred when you dropped your dose. 

I never did an updose...just a reinstatement from a cold turkey.

I know some who have done a small updose with no issues. Your situation is a bit complex because of other too fast tapers and what seems like a negative reaction to the mirtazapine.

I think if you go slow like DrH mentioned....you minimize any issues. 

❤️🙏

Anyone who thinks ADs are easy have no clue.

I think I’m going to have to try to go up a little bit
inner aka and deep twisting ter**r are making it extremely difficult to get through the day without my mom wanting to take me to the ER

2 hours ago, Finni said:

Is there any chance that slowly working back to 15 mg is going to make me feel better?

Honestly Finni. We don’t know. My suspicion is unfortunately not. My gut tells me to stay put. But it is your choice. 
 

Im so very sorry for what you having to deal with at the moment. Just awful.  No one should ever have to suffer like this. We are here for you. You will be ok eventually hang in there.