3 minutes ago, Fullhealing said:

You are one of if not the biggest example for an incredible spirit here @Chippy bless your heart for everything that you do!!

Bless you Fullhealing xxx

Sorry @Fullhealing

It looks like I posted my question in your tread. Do you know how to move it to mine?

1 minute ago, Haa said:

Sorry @Fullhealing

It looks like I posted my question in your tread. Do you know how to move it to mine?

Sorry @Haa @Fullhealing, I didn't notice this and replied here too. Ive just move your post @Haa back to your thread along with my response. Chippy

I can’t find my thread. Keep posting in @Fullhealing s tread. I guess I might wait a little before reducing. I didn’t notice this before now. 

@Fullhealing So sorry to hear of your struggles ...keep doing what you do best ..putting one foot infront of the other and moving forward . Wishing you good healing ,youve got this 🤗

10 minutes ago, Haa said:

I can’t find my thread. Keep posting in @Fullhealing s tread. I guess I might wait a little before reducing. I didn’t notice this before now. 

Ill move it now for you xxx

Thanks

How do I put a link to my tread in mig signatur? That would help a lot 🙂

 

18 minutes ago, Beehive said:

@Fullhealing So sorry to hear of your struggles ...keep doing what you do best ..putting one foot infront of the other and moving forward . Wishing you good healing ,youve got this 🤗

Thank you @Beehive will do 🙏 hope you're doing well ✨

Edited April 10Apr 10 by Fullhealing

38 minutes ago, Haa said:

Thanks

How do I put a link to my tread in mig signatur? That would help a lot 🙂

 

Done it for you @Haa

Update 7:50am

After my last update I fell asleep for another 5 hours plus another 3 hours during the day, dirty sleep with many awakenings but I can finally sleep so nothing to complain about! massive improvement, grateful.

Yesterday my mind took a strong hold with his dirty games, looping intrusive thoughts with dives of despair but had to dragge myself to the minimum required tasks, glad I at least did that.

Physically, much better, yesterday there was still severe pain in the sinuses/eyes/cheeks but now it is almost gone.

Digestion, there are still moments during the day that it gets out of control but comparing to whole day non-stop it's significant improvement.

Twitching-returned in the last two days but less severe.

Tonight I hardly slept but totally understandable with the oversleeping of the last few days.

Currently, mood is still in a dive but now that there is an opportunity to travel a little further without fear of interruptions I will try to force myself for a relaxing purifying visit to the sea, will try to do it daily, drive a little to change the atmosphere, home/work for such a long period is a recipe for suffocation.

We will see how things moves today.

It’s so good to get some sleep @Fullhealing even if it’s not the best. It all counts for sure!

 

I have had those looping thoughts. They are so frustrating. Like your mind isn’t your own. I would find myself obsessed over the silliest of things. Sometimes I’d get a song in my head even and it wouldn’t go. I’d just have it there permanently for days. But yes sometimes memories from the past. Not always bad ones. Just things I’d not thought about for 20 years. Odd. Like the nervous system had spent the day opening ALL the draws in the filing cabinets of my brain!

 

Sorry your symptoms are not great still, but it’s good you are seeing some improvement. 😀

 

I live near the sea too. About 15 min drive. I hadn’t been this whole year yet. I went the other day. I think I said. It was great. So healing for some reason. I must remember to go more. 

2 hours ago, Chippy said:

It’s so good to get some sleep @Fullhealing even if it’s not the best. It all counts for sure!

 

I have had those looping thoughts. They are so frustrating. Like your mind isn’t your own. I would find myself obsessed over the silliest of things. Sometimes I’d get a song in my head even and it wouldn’t go. I’d just have it there permanently for days. But yes sometimes memories from the past. Not always bad ones. Just things I’d not thought about for 20 years. Odd. Like the nervous system had spent the day opening ALL the draws in the filing cabinets of my brain!

 

Sorry your symptoms are not great still, but it’s good you are seeing some improvement. 😀

 

I live near the sea too. About 15 min drive. I hadn’t been this whole year yet. I went the other day. I think I said. It was great. So healing for some reason. I must remember to go more. 

Thanks dear @Chippy spot on with the drawers, if only just the encouraging ones would open.. well, eventually we will have full control over which drawers to open, if any.

And yes, the sea has this magic, something in the frequencies there always does good, it's funny, it's very close to me as well like 20 min drive but somehow in this process getting there feels like flying to the moon..

We can remind each other every now and then 🤗

 

I also find the sea very calming and its not far from me ...hope you have a better day today 🙏

3 minutes ago, Beehive said:

I also find the sea very calming and its not far from me ...hope you have a better day today 🙏

Thank you! Maybe it's time to get organized and go? I'll try today, it's a beautiful day for it here.

Excellent idea 😊 we've had some nice weather but it's cloudy and chilly today !

Just now, Beehive said:

Excellent idea 😊 we've had some nice weather but it's cloudy and chilly today !

Let's go together in our thoughts 😊

Together we go 🤝

33 minutes ago, Fullhealing said:

somehow in this process getting there feels like flying to the moon.

Yes I know what you mean! Some days, leaving the house is more than I can even imagine. Those are the bad days.

 

33 minutes ago, Fullhealing said:

We can remind each other every now and then 🤗

this is a great idea!

 

Not a good day here. Grey Rainy 😞 Better days to come! We have had some lovley days recently, must not complain!

Sending you Good healing amd peaceful moments 🙏

13 hours ago, Fullhealing said:

Update 7:50am

After my last update I fell asleep for another 5 hours plus another 3 hours during the day, dirty sleep with many awakenings but I can finally sleep so nothing to complain about! massive improvement, grateful.

Yesterday my mind took a strong hold with his dirty games, looping intrusive thoughts with dives of despair but had to dragge myself to the minimum required tasks, glad I at least did that.

Physically, much better, yesterday there was still severe pain in the sinuses/eyes/cheeks but now it is almost gone.

Digestion, there are still moments during the day that it gets out of control but comparing to whole day non-stop it's significant improvement.

Twitching-returned in the last two days but less severe.

Tonight I hardly slept but totally understandable with the oversleeping of the last few days.

Currently, mood is still in a dive but now that there is an opportunity to travel a little further without fear of interruptions I will try to force myself for a relaxing purifying visit to the sea, will try to do it daily, drive a little to change the atmosphere, home/work for such a long period is a recipe for suffocation.

We will see how things moves today.

Seems you are doing great.  I'm proud of you ..

 

Sleep three hours in the day time, it's improving.  I still can't do that in 16 months journey.   The most I have slept during day is an hour.   Only one time I did two hours.....but it doesn't bother me....

Update 1am

Terrible mental day, such a huge tsunami hit not much after my morning update, no sea or anything just laid at home with a very heavy feeling and just now that I'm already half asleep I got horrible news of the death of a good friend of mine who I haven't seen since the beginning of the process, I'm so heartbroken, he tried several times to make contact but I rejected all his efforts and everyone else in general, I simply couldn't and still can't handle physical human interaction except for the necessary like work, etc.

He was many years older, such a loving person, we shared many beautiful trips abroad together in the past and I feel so guilty that I wasn't there for him in his last moments.

I have no idea how I'm going to the Shiva in my current state, dealing with his family and in general with all the rising emotions.

I'm just very sad and full of guilt atm.

Oh @Fullhealing. I'm so sorry about the loss of your friend. Things would definitely have played out differently if you knew that his passing was coming. You didn't know. Please don't beat yourself up about this. I believe you will see him again one day, and he will understand. 🙏♥️

5 hours ago, Fullhealing said:

Update 1am

Terrible mental day, such a huge tsunami hit not much after my morning update, no sea or anything just laid at home with a very heavy feeling and just now that I'm already half asleep I got horrible news of the death of a good friend of mine who I haven't seen since the beginning of the process, I'm so heartbroken, he tried several times to make contact but I rejected all his efforts and everyone else in general, I simply couldn't and still can't handle physical human interaction except for the necessary like work, etc.

He was many years older, such a loving person, we shared many beautiful trips abroad together in the past and I feel so guilty that I wasn't there for him in his last moments.

I have no idea how I'm going to the Shiva in my current state, dealing with his family and in general with all the rising emotions.

I'm just very sad and full of guilt atm.

I find those heavy emotions almost unbearable @Fullhealing. I try to reassure myself it's my body communicating its needs, or it's WD/healing/rebuilding. Sounds like yours are real - grief is especially draining. Time to be extra kind to yourself, and nip it in the bud if you find yourself self guilt tripping. 🤗

5 hours ago, Fullhealing said:

Update 1am

Terrible mental day, such a huge tsunami hit not much after my morning update, no sea or anything just laid at home with a very heavy feeling and just now that I'm already half asleep I got horrible news of the death of a good friend of mine who I haven't seen since the beginning of the process, I'm so heartbroken, he tried several times to make contact but I rejected all his efforts and everyone else in general, I simply couldn't and still can't handle physical human interaction except for the necessary like work, etc.

He was many years older, such a loving person, we shared many beautiful trips abroad together in the past and I feel so guilty that I wasn't there for him in his last moments.

I have no idea how I'm going to the Shiva in my current state, dealing with his family and in general with all the rising emotions.

I'm just very sad and full of guilt atm.

Oh @Fullhealing I’m so sorry. This is awful. My heart goes out to you. Don’t be hard on yourself. You have to do what is best for you, that was and is still the right choice. Go easy on yourself won’t you. Xxxx

So sorry for your loss @Fullhealing. 

 

Be very compassionate and gentle on yourself. 

 

I can so relate to your tapering trauma after reading your updates. I wish we lived near each other xx 

 

We are suffering together and my heart goes out to you. xxx